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Family Photos Minus One

Family Photos Minus One

Last week the kids and I went to Fort Walton Beach for a week of fun and sun. This vacation was one I planned with two other families that we are friends with. In total, we had 5 adults and 10 children...

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Stops Along the Road

Stops Along the Road

On Thursday, September 28th, Rich and I would’ve celebrated our 27th Wedding Anniversary. As I’ve shared in my bi-line and bio below, we celebrated our 25th anniversary up at the Jersey Shore, also...

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Talking to the dead.

Talking to the dead.

With fall definitely in the air and “spooky season” upon us, I thought it would be a good time to tell you all that I talk to dead people. No, I don’t profess to be a psychic medium (truth...

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Self Compassion

Self Compassion

Revisited The poetry in italics are quotes from a blog post entitled Self Compassion written by my earlier widowed self. This post is a clarification and love note to my current widowed self.   When...

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Where is Daddy?

Where is Daddy?

Each day still takes my breath away a little. Each realization that Erik is no longer here and it truly is just me and the twins now. There is no escaping this reality or pretending it isn’t true any...

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I Miss Him Out Loud

I Miss Him Out Loud

An old friend of ours called me this week. He calls on occasion to check in on the kids and me. Every time he calls, he asks how the house is and if I need help with anything. I have yet to accept his...

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A “Weekness” For Dogs

A “Weekness” For Dogs

Sometime around 2009, I came across an observance called National Dog Week. Founded by a man named Captain Wm. Lewis Judy in 1928, this intriguing slice of canine Americana fascinated me; there really...

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Portals in Time

Portals in Time

This past week, two of my cats have found such good hiding places in my house that I honestly couldn’t find them, even though I looked everywhere. I jokingly thought to myself that there might be a secret...

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Loneliness

Loneliness

Gary is out today but this is a post worth re-reading that Gary did in May talking about Loneliness.   As a widower, I make the effort to cultivate my friendships and acquaintances. By doing so I...

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Introverts: Stay in the Work

Introverts: Stay in the Work

I get overwhelmed easily with “too many” of anything. Too many choices, too many words at first glance, too many ways to find my way to peace and healing. I have to back away. Take a beat...

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Living with Triggers

Living with Triggers

After going through such a traumatic loss having anxiety and being scared or jumpy all seemed to be part of the package. A year and a half in those feelings are still there. They might not be as intense...

Read More

Death and Taxes

Death and Taxes

Nothing is certain in life except death and taxes, at least that is what they say. As a widow, I can also tell you that nothing complicates taxes like the death of your spouse. In April of 2021, our taxes...

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Newly Widowed

Self Compassion

Self Compassion

Revisited The poetry in italics are quotes from a blog post entitled Self Compassion written by my earlier widowed self. This post is a clarification and love note to my current widowed self.   When...

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Introverts: Stay in the Work

Introverts: Stay in the Work

I get overwhelmed easily with “too many” of anything. Too many choices, too many words at first glance, too many ways to find my way to peace and healing. I have to back away. Take a beat...

Read More

A Widowed Introvert: Part Four

A Widowed Introvert: Part Four

How does resilience help widowed people heal? The Soaring Spirits Resilience Center research team asked widowed people to help us define resilience as it applies to the widowed experience and the results...

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A Widowed Introvert: Part Three

A Widowed Introvert: Part Three

RESILIENCE Resilience is the ability to withstand adversity and bounce back from difficult life events. Being resilient does not mean a person doesn’t experience stress, emotional upheaval, and suffering...

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A Widowed Introvert: Part Two

A Widowed Introvert: Part Two

What Grief Adds to the Mix In talking with other introverts, many report that grief adds one more layer to navigate in the world. One more layer in addition to the fact that grief is overwhelming in and...

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Get to know Diana..again!

Get to know Diana..again!

Hello Tuesday readers! Diana is on vacation this week so I wanted to post her introduction again, as she has been writing for Widow’s Voice for 6 weeks now! Sometimes we need a reintroduction of...

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A Widowed Introvert: Part One

A Widowed Introvert: Part One

How are things different for me? We are unique widowed beings. Our widowhood contains every experience that formed us throughout our lifetime. We are widowed young, old, and in-between. It is fair to say...

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Healing Support Tools:

Healing Support Tools:

A Simple Dinner Party for Widowed Folk The clutter of food leftovers waiting for containers is evidence of an evening’s gift of food, conversation, kindness, and even laughter! Welcome to the Soaring...

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No.

No.

Yesterday I had a video call with some of the widows that I’ve met at Camp over the last few years. We usually keep in touch via text, but it was great to look at their faces instead of the text bubbles...

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Poet in Lower Case:

Poet in Lower Case:

e.e. cummings (here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows higher than soul can hope or mind can hide) –e.e.c.     i met...

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Revisiting a Story by the Nasturtiums

Revisiting a Story by the Nasturtiums

On the Eve of Camp Widow San Diego — 2023 It is a joy and a privilege to attend Camp Widow’s 15th Anniversary camp in San Diego this Thursday. A-a-a-a-n-d — I am not packed! This is a...

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Widowed Customs: The Ring

Widowed Customs: The Ring

Another 4th of July—another wedding anniversary for the books. Dan left on April 15, 2021, so the first anniversary without him came up just three months after his burial. At just over two years...

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Soaring Spirits Interational

Soaring Spirits Interational

Soaring Spirits builds community. We create, and maintain, innovative peer-based grief support programs for widowed men and women that serve a worldwide population. Based on the powerful connections created by shared experience, we endeavor to ensure that no one need grieve alone.

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Will Weddings Always Be Hard

Will Weddings Always Be Hard

A fellow widow asked if weddings would always be hard for us to go to and I found myself looking back to the first wedding I attended after Tony died. It was an out-of-town wedding that took place 6 weeks...

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Three Years’ Ago This Week

Three Years’ Ago This Week

Lee died three years’ ago this week — on July 2 to be precise. This year the date fell on a Sunday. This year, when I awoke, Robyn was with me. I felt no ambivalence about this circumstance...

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The trickiness of “How Are You?”

The trickiness of “How Are You?”

Image by Markus Spiske on Unsplash Yesterday, a fellow widbud, a woman I have never met but who someone connected with me, and who lost her husband just before Christmas 2022 after a very short illness,...

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Time After Time After Time After Time

Time After Time After Time After Time

Photos my own This is – and will continue to be – a weekend full of experiments. A lot of my life is still versions of experimentation, if not in the ways it was immediately post-loss(es) when even...

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“The relationship I always wanted….”

“The relationship I always wanted….”

Photo of my parents in 1961 in Córdoba, Spain – from their archives Medjool and I have just had a lovely 10 day “working break”, based mostly at my parents’ house in Céret in the Pyrénées...

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I wish I could better imagine…

I wish I could better imagine…

Photos my own – taken at Christmas 2022, on runs with my dad Sometimes I stop short in my tracks and realise with desperate sadness that I can no longer imagine what my life would be like with Mike...

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What do Mother’s Day, Handy Men, T-shirts and Jazz have in common?

What do Mother’s Day, Handy Men, T-shirts and Jazz have in common?

Photo my own   You might well ask. Well, one answer, and the only one I have right now, is that these words, or words related to them, are on sticky notes, forming a dense, colourful and messy pile,...

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Credits

Credits

Photo my own screenshot  A long, long time ago, back in the last millennium, in the time when there were dinosaurs, and during the 7 month period between 1997 and 1998 where I had a brilliantly exciting...

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Grief Work

Grief Work

Over the past  6 months or so I have started to realize how much more grief work I have to do. I think I went through a period where it felt like I had done it all. Not that I was “over it”...

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8th April

8th April

Photos my own, taken today   It generates a sicky feeling in my tummy. A sinking of my heart. A shortening of my breath. An increase in my heart’s rate. A tensing of my belly. A weakening of my...

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Taking Stock

Taking Stock

I’ve explained that my recent travels with Lola the pup to explore Arizona and parts southwest felt like an imperative. Simply put, I had to go. To accomplish the mission I did a lot of driving over...

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“Pas Voulu Mais Choisi”

“Pas Voulu Mais Choisi”

Image by Josue Michel on Unsplash 18 March 2023 I have just come back from my Saturday morning swim with the Masters. When I say, “with the Masters”, I speak rather relatively. Yes, I am part of the...

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A “Weekness” For Dogs

A “Weekness” For Dogs

Sometime around 2009, I came across an observance called National Dog Week. Founded by a man named Captain Wm. Lewis Judy in 1928, this intriguing slice of canine Americana fascinated me; there really...

Read More

Widowed Customs: The Ring

Widowed Customs: The Ring

Another 4th of July—another wedding anniversary for the books. Dan left on April 15, 2021, so the first anniversary without him came up just three months after his burial. At just over two years...

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Another One Down

Another One Down

Last week I was just feeling off. I didn’t go to my workout class once. All I wanted to do was eat chocolate, french fries, and curl up to escape into the fantasy saga I’m reading. It took me until...

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“Firsts” Moving Forward

“Firsts” Moving Forward

Tomorrow is Father’s Day and for the first time in my life I won’t be celebrating the occasion with my dad. On Tuesday of last week, my father’s cremains were interred at the Gerald B. H. Solomon...

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Παρακαλώ και ευχαριστώ

Παρακαλώ και ευχαριστώ

Main image by Sergio Garcia on Unsplash Back in the very early 1980s – or perhaps it was even the very late 1970s – I am not entirely sure… my mum started to learn Greek. I don’t know why she started,...

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Nephew Like a Son

Nephew Like a Son

Yesterday marked the one year anniversary of the passing of my nephew, Zac. It is still so surreal to acknowledge that fact. Tomorrow he would’ve celebrated his 41st birthday. He was the only son of...

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I wish I could better imagine…

I wish I could better imagine…

Photos my own – taken at Christmas 2022, on runs with my dad Sometimes I stop short in my tracks and realise with desperate sadness that I can no longer imagine what my life would be like with Mike...

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Happy Dog Mom’s Day

Happy Dog Mom’s Day

“…in some magical way, time seems to stand still for our canines, and that they will love, need, and appreciate you, fur-ever.” With the passing of my father two weeks ago, I’ve been...

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Timelines and Revisions

Timelines and Revisions

  A few years ago when I was working as a Substitute Teacher, or as some of us say, “Guest Educator” I recall a day spent as a librarian for a local elementary school. In addition to returning...

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Our Anniversary, Number 16 and Number 2

Our Anniversary, Number 16 and Number 2

  Friday would have been our 16th wedding anniversary and it’s the 2nd one he’s missed. The last two years I have intentionally been away from home on St. Patrick’s Day. Last year, the kids...

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A Love Letter

A Love Letter

After Valentine’s Day Hey love, I made it through another valentines day — so well, in fact, that I forgot it was Wednesday and I’m just writing this! Writing to you is always easier...

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It’s Not About the Roses

It’s Not About the Roses

Image by Yoksel on Unsplash It’s Valentine’s Day already in some parts of the world. I know that the date fills a number of my fellow widbuds with Horror. Or Grief. Or Sadness. Or Resentment. There’s...

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Camp Widow®

Camp Widow®

Camp Widow® is a unique and incredible experience. This program provides both practical tools and relevant resources for widowed persons rebuilding their lives in the aftermath of the death of a spouse or partner.

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Family Photos Minus One

Family Photos Minus One

Last week the kids and I went to Fort Walton Beach for a week of fun and sun. This vacation was one I planned with two other families that we are friends with. In total, we had 5 adults and 10 children...

Read More

Talking to the dead.

Talking to the dead.

With fall definitely in the air and “spooky season” upon us, I thought it would be a good time to tell you all that I talk to dead people. No, I don’t profess to be a psychic medium (truth...

Read More

Self Compassion

Self Compassion

Revisited The poetry in italics are quotes from a blog post entitled Self Compassion written by my earlier widowed self. This post is a clarification and love note to my current widowed self.   When...

Read More

Where is Daddy?

Where is Daddy?

Each day still takes my breath away a little. Each realization that Erik is no longer here and it truly is just me and the twins now. There is no escaping this reality or pretending it isn’t true any...

Read More

I Miss Him Out Loud

I Miss Him Out Loud

An old friend of ours called me this week. He calls on occasion to check in on the kids and me. Every time he calls, he asks how the house is and if I need help with anything. I have yet to accept his...

Read More

Loneliness

Loneliness

Gary is out today but this is a post worth re-reading that Gary did in May talking about Loneliness.   As a widower, I make the effort to cultivate my friendships and acquaintances. By doing so I...

Read More

Introverts: Stay in the Work

Introverts: Stay in the Work

I get overwhelmed easily with “too many” of anything. Too many choices, too many words at first glance, too many ways to find my way to peace and healing. I have to back away. Take a beat...

Read More

Living with Triggers

Living with Triggers

After going through such a traumatic loss having anxiety and being scared or jumpy all seemed to be part of the package. A year and a half in those feelings are still there. They might not be as intense...

Read More

Death and Taxes

Death and Taxes

Nothing is certain in life except death and taxes, at least that is what they say. As a widow, I can also tell you that nothing complicates taxes like the death of your spouse. In April of 2021, our taxes...

Read More

Other Pathways

Other Pathways

Lately, I have taken to reading random Widow’s Blog posts, which are maintained in the Soaring Spirits archives, by authors who have come and gone from this site. Initially, I mainly was interested in...

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A Widowed Introvert: Part Four

A Widowed Introvert: Part Four

How does resilience help widowed people heal? The Soaring Spirits Resilience Center research team asked widowed people to help us define resilience as it applies to the widowed experience and the results...

Read More

The Potty Milestone

The Potty Milestone

It’s one in a few when I get those proud parenting moments as a solo parent. I always feel as if I’m not doing enough or I’m not giving enough or I’m just not enough for them. How does one person...

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Stops Along the Road

Stops Along the Road

On Thursday, September 28th, Rich and I would’ve celebrated our 27th Wedding Anniversary. As I’ve shared in my bi-line and bio below, we celebrated our 25th anniversary up at the Jersey Shore, also...

Read More

Pleasant Beginnings

Pleasant Beginnings

To comprehend how far we’ve moved forward after a life-changing event, it’s helpful to take a look back. I often ask myself to recall what I was doing a year, or even more, earlier at any given time...

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August Slipped Away

August Slipped Away

August has always been such a busy month in our lives. Our entire family’s birthdays. Summer plans, parties, trips…memories. This past month, mostly these past two weeks have been more of a rollercoaster...

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The Mosson Love Story

The Mosson Love Story

As my birthday approaches next week so does the day that I met Erik. I met him the day after my 21st birthday. I always told him getting to meet him was my late, but amazing life-changing birthday gift...

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“Winding” My Own Business

“Winding” My Own Business

  It is hard for me to grasp that next month marks one year that I’ve posted here at The Widow’s Voice. Each one of the “Blogging Seven” – one writer for each day of the week –...

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July 25th

July 25th

Another July 25th has come and gone. It was the day that Boris and I used to call our dating anniversary. We weren’t really sure when our actual anniversary was, but I knew it was around this time...

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Widowed Customs: The Ring

Widowed Customs: The Ring

Another 4th of July—another wedding anniversary for the books. Dan left on April 15, 2021, so the first anniversary without him came up just three months after his burial. At just over two years...

Read More

Dos Urban Cantinos

Dos Urban Cantinos

Paul texted me Tuesday morning. He said that he wanted to see me and would come by my place. He suggested that we should have dinner together. I strongly suspected Paul’s message had not arrived entirely...

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I Said Yes!

I Said Yes!

Yesterday, April 28th marked the anniversary of my engagement to my late husband, Rich, in 1996, and also the 18 month milestone of my Widowhood Journey. Both milestones represent life-changing occasions...

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Deathiversary Two

Deathiversary Two

Last week was a heavy week for me. Thursday marked two years since Tony died by suicide, leaving behind unanswered questions and heartache. These are the waves of grief we see coming and we can almost...

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Poster Child – but not for the reasons I would have wanted

Poster Child – but not for the reasons I would have wanted

Photo by P – family friend – photo of our two girls, which P keeps stuck behind a piece of art from Julia It was Julia’s 19th birthday a couple of weeks ago. On 30th March. Still her birthday...

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8th April

8th April

Photos my own, taken today   It generates a sicky feeling in my tummy. A sinking of my heart. A shortening of my breath. An increase in my heart’s rate. A tensing of my belly. A weakening of my...

Read More

The Widowed Resilience Scale

The Widowed Resilience Scale

Resilience is defined as the ability to ‘bounce back’ or recover from a traumatic life event or circumstance. According to the Holmes and Rahe Social Readjustment Scale widowhood rates as one of life’s most challenging experiences. This fact has driven the desire to study resilience in widowhood and identify the ways in which resilience can be built in men and women who have experienced conjugal loss.

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Featured Author

Meet this weeks Widow's Voice author.

Emma Pearson

Emma Pearson

My life is a whirling mix of swishy strands, dark and glowing brightly, rough and silky smooth – all attempting to be seen, felt and integrated at once. Here are some of my themes.

I am British

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