It happened last night in a waking dream. The other day I was on a call about grief. In poetic prose, the speaker mentioned “hearing the beating of her heart.” She repeated that phrase at least three times. I wonder. . . is the beating of our hearts a reminder? Returning to her words, I […]
Widowed Memories
Art Reflects Life
It’s not surprising that things hit differently once we are widowed, but sometimes it’s still unexpected. In 2019, I excitedly ordered tickets to Hamilton when it was coming through on tour. Tony didn’t love the theatre like I did, but he put up with a show every now and then because he loved me. My […]
What Grows On
My last two posts have focused on the inner workings and transformation of house, home and human in the wake of profound loss. It was so gratifying to see my post, “Staying in Place”, written earlier this month recently featured on the Facebook Page of Soaring Spirits, International, and to see it appreciated by those […]
Our Anniversary, Number 16 and Number 2
Friday would have been our 16th wedding anniversary and it’s the 2nd one he’s missed. The last two years I have intentionally been away from home on St. Patrick’s Day. Last year, the kids and I went to Florida to visit my parents. This year we spent a long weekend in the Ozarks with […]
My Blogiversary
This post marks my one-year anniversary as a writer for the Widow’s Voice. 52 weeks of sharing my journey with fellow widowed people and our support networks that follow this blog. There are weeks I start to write this and I’m not sure what direction it’ll go. Other times, I know exactly what has been […]
Staying in Place
I remember the day I drove home from the hospital up in Brunswick, Georgia, with the hard realization that Rich would never be walking up to our front door again. That is a sobering and defining moment. During the 3 weeks he’d spent in the ICU, each drive home was filled with a glimmer of […]
Hiking With Some Friends Across Desert Mountains
It’s sunny and clear, but still cool on this late winter morning when Linda, Ross, and I arrive at the trailhead parking lot in Ross’ car. Lola and I were the first to arrive at Ross and Janet’s house; Bob and Linda arrive a few minutes later. While Bob and Janet remain behind for health […]
Transformation
Days of the “goo” were common, in the first days of grief in spring 2021. Goo refers to what happens to caterpillars after they close themselves up in a cocoon. They liquify and live in the liminal space of “no longer this” and “not yet that” — I relate to those words. The transformation that […]
Love Is Not Always Enough
Image by freestocks on Unsplash Last night I saw “The Son”, which I knew would be a hard film. (** Spoiler Alerts ** Don’t read if you want to see the film **) I knew from the trailer that it was about teenage struggle – possibly linked to mental health issues related to loss, gender- […]
March-ing Forth with The Memory Keepers
February was a busy time on several fronts. The local Art Gala that had taken months of committee work and preparation for me as an organizer and participating artist was a great success. The hard work, anxiety and anticipation over. Just a few days later, my brother and his wife arrived in Georgia for a […]
Putting the Band Back Together
This week has featured non-stop socializing. For one week, my dear friends, Bob and Linda, are visiting here from Ohio. Linda was Lee’s best friend. My friendship with Bob goes back to our days in high school. Bob’s doctors have given him a clean bill for the moment, opening a travel window for him and […]
Reliving the Worst
I try not to relive the trauma of the day our lives changed forever too often. The memories are seared into my brain and are always there to conjure if prompted. I do my best to let them lay because they are so painful to hold on the surface for too long. Yesterday, a friend […]