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Widowed Without Children

The “Better Place”

Posted on: April 3, 2021 | Posted by: Bryan Martin

“It’s so hard to lose someone but remember he’s in a…” I’ve always struggled with religion. I was raised Irish Catholic and being gay was not accepted the way it is more openly today. I’m not sharing this to start a discussion on religious beliefs but to paint a picture of this aspect of my […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed & Unmarried, Widowed Without Children, Widowed Memories, Widowed Emotions, LGBTQ+ Widowed, Widowed by Illness

Bachelor of Grief

Posted on: March 20, 2021 | Posted by: Bryan Martin

I never wanted to apply and enroll here at Widowed University. I’ve always been opened to learning more in life but I never wanted this education. Like I said last week, the build up to Clayton’s death day is one of the hardest times of the year for me. Two years last April I got […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed & Unmarried, Widowed Without Children, Widowed Memories, Widowed and Healing, Widowed and New Love, Widowed Anniversaries, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Belongings, Widowed Emotions, LGBTQ+ Widowed, Widowed by Illness

Wid-OWED

Posted on: February 13, 2021 | Posted by: Bryan Martin

Wid-OWED This week has been tough. I have had conversations with probate court to try and finalize Clayton’s Will and picked up Stallone’s (our cat) ashes back from the veterinarian. Now he and Clayton sit on a bookshelf until we can figure out a funeral for them. I’m coming up on 3 years since Clayton […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed & Unmarried, Widowed Without Children, Widowed Memories, Widowed Holidays, Widowed Belongings, Widowed Emotions, LGBTQ+ Widowed, Widowed by Illness

Taking Time for My Grief

Posted on: January 31, 2021 | Posted by: Victoria Helmly

When I began to write, I realized that I do not have a lot to say today and my brain is going in a million directions. I think it may be because life has been pretty busy lately. My dad requires more care, a responsibility I share with my mom and sister, and I am […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed & Unmarried, Widowed Without Children, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Suddenly

Pets and People Years

Posted on: January 30, 2021 | Posted by: Bryan Martin

Everyone has a set time here on this Animal Planet. When we take in a new family member, we know there are good chances we will be there for their whole life and still be here when they have moved on. It’s a normal part of life and we buffer our emotions by planning ahead […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed & Unmarried, Widowed Without Children, Widowed Effect on Family/Friends, Widowed Memories, Widowed Emotions, LGBTQ+ Widowed, Widowed by Illness, Miscellaneous

The Upside Down

Posted on: January 9, 2021 | Posted by: Bryan Martin

I have always had trouble when I’m told that there is no way out and no solution to things. Apparently, looking back at my writing, that fact holds true even in loss and grief. I didn’t realize at first but it explains my anger when I was hit with the regular “whys?” and the “what […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed & Unmarried, Widowed Without Children, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions, LGBTQ+ Widowed, Widowed by Illness

Table for One? No Thanks. I’ll Just Wait At The Bar.

Posted on: December 5, 2020 | Posted by: Bryan Martin

Some may love going out to eat alone but for me it is emotional. Even waiting for takeout can be tough. Grabbing dinner this week, I sat at the bar and got an awkward look from one group. I’m sure it was nothing but that doesn’t mean my feelings weren’t valid. Whatever it was that […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed & Unmarried, Widowed Without Children, Widowed Emotions, LGBTQ+ Widowed, Widowed by Illness

The Pain and Possibilities of “Yes”

Posted on: November 28, 2020 | Posted by: Bryan Martin

The first thing I learned to do when Clayton passed away was say “No”. I said no to getting out of bed, no to eating, no to showering, no to the gym. No was the safest place I could hide myself. Saying no stopped the world and that is just where I wanted to be. […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed & Unmarried, Widowed Without Children, Widowed Effect on Family/Friends, Widowed Memories, Widowed and Healing, Widowed and New Love, Widowed Holidays, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions, LGBTQ+ Widowed, Widowed by Illness

Return To Me

Posted on: October 10, 2020 | Posted by: Bryan Martin

Today, I find myself in Texas near Houston. A speaking engagement planned almost a year ago. It has been a long time since I have been able to travel, speak and feel the energy in a room of people. This new world we live in can be suffocating especially for a widowed man who sometimes […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed & Unmarried, Widowed Without Children, Widowed Memories, Widowed Anniversaries, Widowed Emotions, LGBTQ+ Widowed, Widowed by Illness

I Don’t Think I Could Stay

Posted on: September 27, 2020 | Posted by: Bryan Martin

Talking to someone who has lost a loved one isn’t the easiest situation. Many people get anxious, some shut down, some unintentionally say the wrong thing. I try to remember that they are hoping to meet me in a space of support by saying something and when that something comes out wrong (which it inevitably […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed & Unmarried, Widowed Without Children, Widowed Effect on Family/Friends, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions, LGBTQ+ Widowed, Widowed by Illness

Gazing Through Grief

Posted on: August 15, 2020 | Posted by: Bryan Martin

So many things have triggered my grief. It all comes down to five senses. There are the predictable ones that stand out like catching the scent of his cologne lingering in the breeze from a man passing by or the lyrics of a song that strike the strings of my heart. The taste of his […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed & Unmarried, Widowed Without Children, Widowed Memories, Widowed Emotions, LGBTQ+ Widowed, Widowed by Illness

The Keeper of the Lighthouse

Posted on: August 1, 2020 | Posted by: Bryan Martin

Grief’s gaze. I knew it as soon as I got it this week. It’s that look you get from someone who has just suffered a new great loss. It conveys so much with so little. It’s so very different from the look they give to others all around them. Yeah it’s quite a powerful look […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed & Unmarried, Widowed Without Children, Widowed Effect on Family/Friends, Widowed Memories, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions, LGBTQ+ Widowed, Widowed by Illness, Multiple Losses

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