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Why I Strive

Posted on: August 21, 2025 | Posted by: Gary Ravitz

I have volunteered to lead occasional tours of my neighborhood for out-of-town visitors. The goal of the not-for-profit organization that is sponsoring these neighborhood tours is to promote understanding among people from diverse cultures and backgrounds. I was required to submit a formal application, which is pending.  However, based on my experience as a volunteer tutor, the application process felt familiar.

Previously, I also volunteered at a neighborhood food pantry.  I began this activity, which involved handing out food donations to a group of pre-screened, economically qualifying individuals, during the tail end of the pandemic, after the first vaccines became available on the market. As hard as I tried to maintain my initial motivation for helping people whom I perceived to be less fortunate than I, the work itself was stultifying and unsatisfying.  It did not help that some clients would remind me through their deeds and words that they were just as mean-spirited, petty, or selfish as the rest of us. I was relieved each winter when  Lola the pup and I departed home for Arizona.  One spring, I returned home but didn’t return to the pantry.  I rationalized that it had a ready supply of volunteers, so my services would not be missed.

***

According to the non-profit organization’s solicitation, I will have some creative input concerning my neighborhood tour. I have lived here for the better part of my adult life, approaching fifty years, and therefore feel that I am well-qualified to perform this task simply by dint of my age and experience. This neighborhood has a long history predating my arrival. It features significant urban architecture and other interesting or unusual urban planning features. It is a good mixture of old and new, but with a distinctly young and artsy vibe.

Despite advancing age, or perhaps because of it, I still hunger to leave my mark. It’s why I write, teach, and maintain my social and professional networks.  It’s why I am drawn to public service in one form or another.

***

Eric and I formally dissolved our law practice some years ago, while Lee was still alive, as part of a calculated exit strategy.  I had anticipated and was looking forward to my retirement with Lee. Now, our former successful business will never be my legacy.

***

Although many people see their children as their legacy, not everybody shares this viewpoint.  See, e.g., Your Children Are Not Your Legacy, by Daniel Scott, found at https://www.forbes.com/sites/danielscott1/2018/03/27/your-children-are-not-your-legacy/ (originally published 3/27/18). Since I have no children, it’s a moot question for me.

***

To me, a legacy isn’t about one’s material possessions.  That is a matter of estate planning.  Rather, it is about your values and how you live your life. Importantly, history reminds us that legacies and reputations are not fixed points.

For example, in his lifetime, Andrew Jackson, the seventh President of the United States, was a “populist hero who challenged the political establishment and ushered in a key era of American exploration and westward expansion.” Why Andrew Jackson’s Legacy Is So Controversial,” by Erin Blakemore, found at https://www.history.com/articles/andrew-jackson-presidency-controversial-legacy, last updated 1/31/25.  Yet, today, in many quarters, Jackson is reviled because he was also a slave owner who unabashedly embraced that institution. He even brought slaves with him while he occupied the White House.  More recently, the widely popular modern figure of Winston Churchill provides another example of someone who has been subjected to similar revisionist scrutiny.  See “Exploring the Good and Bad of Winston Churchill’s Legacy,” by Louise Flatley, found at https://www.thevintagenews.com/2019/02/02/winston-churchill/.  In short, one’s legacy is neither inherently positive nor inherently negative.

For each person, your life is what you make of it. Of course, my aspirations for leaving a legacy are far more modest than either President Jackson or Prime Minister Churchill. However, I strive to be consistent. And should my deeds or words help to inspire even one person to live a better life, I will consider my own a life well lived.

Categories: Widowed Without Children, Widowed Effect on Family/Friends

About Gary Ravitz

In relevant part, my musings are for me. It’s one of the ways in which I process losing my sweetest. Of course, Lee didn’t want to die. She had fought like hell, but the relentless cancers kept coming: Skin cancers; breast cancer; head and neck cancer; colon cancer; and finally, the deadly pancreatic cancer. In June 2020, and only after being pressed hard by Lee, her oncologist opined that my wife had from two weeks to two months left to live, turned on her heels and nearly sprinted from the hospital room, never again to be seen or heard from by us. I promptly removed Lee from the hospital and brought her home. It was the right thing to do and I only wish I had acted sooner over “the best” medical advice to the contrary. In fact, my sweet wife only had nine days left to live. At the final, she embraced her own death with great courage and unfailing kindness. It was a truly remarkable display of grace and wondrous to behold. It was my great privilege and honor to be with her every step of the way. And now, it’s my privilege to be able to write a few words to you each week. In a nutshell, I believe every journey is unique, but, hopefully, to know that you do not have to walk it alone can also be reassuring. And, along the way, you might hear a bit more information about me.
Gary

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