Photo my own – Andorran Pyrenees I am just back from three weeks holidays spent with Medjool. It’s been lovely. Refreshing. Renewing. Most of the time we were walking in the Pyrenees, east to west, heading from the Mediterranean sea towards the Atlantic ocean. We walked for about 12 days with a few rest days […]
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Self Love (take2)
Learning to fiercely love ourselves might be the greatest and most important love affair of our lives.
(Go on, read that again. Take a moment. Let it sink in.)
Yep. As widowed people, it is up to us to master love in a new way. We have lost the physical touch, and the voice of our beloved; but we still have the blueprints of their love imprinted on our skin and in our Souls. We know how to give and receive love because of them. So, now we must craft a way to love on ourselves when our lovers are no longer here to do this for themselves.
Remember Me
After living with the loss of Don Shepherd for an entire decade now, one thing is for certain that I never question or no longer worry about … I will never, ever forget him. I wont forget his crooked smile, or his enormous laugh that was sometimes 92% in his shoulders shaking like a small […]
The Grief Dating Game
Well I guess we should just talk about it. Having to even think about dating again after Clayton passed away completely sucks. Dating is hard enough as it is but adding on being widowed, gay and living in the south is a hot mess. There are like 3 gay guys here. Two of them are […]
Lonely in Missing Him
Boris was outgoing, although introverted, and very friendly with everyone he met. His goofy personality and genuine care made him memorable and easy to be around. However, he didn’t have many really close friends. He was still close with some of his high school friends, but they’d grown apart with distance and life changes (one […]
The Dinner
My friends Bob and Linda are in town for the week. Bob is one of my oldest friends and a charter member of our imaginary rock group, The Frazier Thomas Band. Linda, Bob’s wife, who was Lee’s best friend, has become one of my best friends. Linda’s birthday was Tuesday. Bob and Linda planned to […]
Reel Therapy = Good Medicine
What is Reel Therapy? Gary Solomon’s popular book of the same name, published originally in 2001 and again in 2015, suggests that movies can be a therapeutic tool for our lives. A friend of mine gave me this book a long time ago and I pulled it out recently with an instinct that it might be […]
Three-Way Pact
Image by Marek Piwnicki on Unsplash What does someone, who wants to believe in the spirit world, and believe that we are souls having a human experience, do, when she has a “meh” experience with someone claiming to connect with spirits of loved ones who have died? She finds another spirit whisperer. There are good […]
Holding my Breath
Anytime I do anything in my life after loss that I never got to do with Don because he died – it gives me this nervous feeling in my gut. I get all shaky and nauseous and I feel faint and hot, like I might fall down. People always tell me “dont feel guilty for […]
The Benefit of Bereavement
I’ve always thought through life on a grand scale – The excitement of positive possibilities. How magical it would be to have an amazing job, a beautiful home and grow old with a true love. I guess the problem with being a big dreamer, now that Clayton has passed away, is that with big dreams […]
The weight of time.
This past week I went with a close friend to the cemetery where her friend is buried. It was the 25th anniversary of his death by suicide. She has been a very supportive friend when Boris was receiving treatment and after his death. Though the loss of her close friend at 18 years old was […]
Reunion
Not unexpectedly, but to my slight disappointment, Lola did not run to greet me as I entered and parked in the driveway. She managed to briefly tear herself away from Donna and the deflated rugby ball cum dog toy long enough to jump up against me once or twice as I rounded the corner of […]