My first email of 2022 contained the subject line, “Greetings from Lee.” In her email, Lee apologized for not previously sending along certain linked photographs. Of course, I highly doubted this message was sent to me by Lee, since it’s now going on two years that she died. Additionally, looking at the URL coupled with […]
Widowed Effect on Family/Friends
One of the Best Things
Photos my own these past days So Christmas and New Year have been okay. Better than okay. Moments that were really hard, of course; but more moments that have been really enjoyable. Ben and Megan came back from the Netherlands where they study, and stayed largely at home while they were here. Medjool went back […]
“Happy” New Year?
Well, somehow tomorrow marks a new year. If I am being honest, I do not feel cheery or happy with the ring of the new year. I feel like 2021 was just a year of surviving and getting by. My dad’s health took a turn in late December 2020 and since then he has needed 24/7 […]
The Magic of the Season
I remember the magic of the holidays when I was younger. Time went by at a much slower pace waiting for that one special night followed by a day of jolly and cheer. Christmas Eve we would spend with my mom’s side of the family surrounded by aunts, uncle, cousins and grandparents. Each year my […]
Sharing My Scare
I am very open about my life, my grief journey, my faults and my growth. This week I hesitated to talk about something because I was very scared. I had to go to the doctor for something I noticed a while back that had changed. I should have gone to the doctor sooner but I […]
Holiday Apologies – Dusting the Grief Off the Garland
An Open Letter to the Holidays… Dear Holidays, As you know, the past 4 years I’ve been trying to figure out life without Clayton. He was always here when you arrived so after he died I couldn’t handle seeing you. I knew you were coming but I couldn’t hang up decorations and I refused to […]
One of the many places . . .
. . . he is missing It began in 2001 when Christmas tree lover, Danielle, was living in a college dorm and needed help to get a Christmas tree for her home away from home. Of course, she called her dad, and so the tradition began. The conversation about “when” would begin during Thanksgiving dinner […]
Thanksgiving Remembrance (Revisited)
[This article first appeared last year about this same time, hence, it’s being “revisited.”] Going back to the start of 2021, I have been volunteering my time on Thursdays at a local food pantry that serves our community. I am off today, however, because we are closed on Thanksgiving, which seems more than a bit […]
Nearing Season’s End
This week I am on a scouting mission to Deer Tick Manor in advance of its unofficial closing on November 29. As I sit down to begin this week’s post, I have not gotten much done today beyond filling my vehicle with “cheap” gas, visiting my neighbors, talking with Robyn a couple times, and baking […]
A Run of Good Luck?
Main image by Dustin Humes on Unsplash I have been wanting to write something about numbers, number patterns, and time, for a while. And specifically that I couldn’t help but notice, some three or four weeks ago, that I hadn’t had another “significant loss” for a while. I feel blessed. No new, massive, significant, life-altering […]
I did a *thing*
Last weekend, I did a “thing”. I went on a weekend trip with a guy (one that is actually *alive*…gasp). I met this guy in summer 2019 when I was giving the dating app thing a try. It’s been over two years, but we have never really made things official because life made things so […]
Grief Gaps
Love and loss are the great unifiers. Later in life the family seems to only get together for weddings and funerals. The most interesting part of my grief is how separated and alone I felt even though I was surrounded by love and support. I was kept separate from the rest of life by the […]