Terrible things happen to people every single day but not everyone experiences terrible things. Some get to float through life without fear, loss or a bigger view of the world. Lucky maybe? However, true gratitude often comes from true grief. There’s a mindset now that any inconvenience is a huge struggle and so many are in search of something “triggering” with no regard to who or what they try to shut down. I was a target for that on social media today because I choose to dance.
What does that have to even do with being widowed? It directly has to do with MY widowhood because MY way of handling MY grief was attacked. For those that don’t know, I love to dance and I share dancing on my social media because it brings me joy. The side effect I never expected was my grief management would inspire others to smile, laugh, dance and keep moving forward verse giving up in grief. Today my dancing was attacked in a comment on a Facebook post:
“There is war in this world this is ridiculous” – Facebook Troll
While the world certainly has terrible things going on, I can’t allow it to consume me or I would fall into constant despair where so many others actively choose to live and try to force others to reside. Tragedy deserves respect but do we all stop generating joy completely forever? If all of us stopped having any kind of happy because of terrible things in this world then this would forever be a globe of grief. Misery loves company and that is why those who choose to stay there want others to commiserate. It’s been almost 4 years since the widowed fog descended on my world yet I must always keep watch. Based on the misery mindset, I should stay sad and you should all join me forever. That is a pandemic I never want to see plague this planet. Every time a person stops smiling the world becomes a darker place.
If my vigilance and acts of personal bravery provides safe space for others to gather, I am honored to stand guard even if it is a 30 second dance that helps just one more person smile. I bet this Typing Troll doesn’t know the amount of “Thank Yous” I get in my messages and that I have had a number of people say my posts give them hope that they will have future smiles. Dear Ms. Misery, I have had messages from people that chose to not make an undoable decision because they see the hope I harvest. You may want me to stop dancing but I want those desperate people to know they are worth it!
What this Facebook foe also doesn’t know is that this week held heartache for me. Clayton’s family is planning to sell his mother’s home here which means I’ll have to go back to the place that took him from me. We never had a chance to have a funeral service and so we most likely will plan it this year on his birthday. Of course that will bring some closure for me but before I can close that door I have to walk through it. I wasn’t expecting the fog to sneak in but I know there’s more freedom in my future as long as I keep moving forward through it so I need to keep dancing first and foremost for me.
So to all the Social Media Satans looking to darken this world – Kiss My Light!
I will not back down and I will not be dimmed because I am the dancing widower. Regardless of whatever fog settles on this world, I will always spread whatever happiness I can and I will always be a guard against grief of both my own and any others seeking refuge. So I have an invitation to the world – LET’S DANCE!
