Main image by Susan Q Yin on Unsplash Our house has long needed a lick of paint, new staining and varnish on wooden floors and stairs, mouldy patches on bathroom ceilings scraped off and refreshed with white paint, new lights/lighting, new curtains sewn so that they match better with whatever is around… And that […]
Blog
Holding Pattern broken
I wrote about feeling restless in year three and I am happy to say that this restlessness has disappeared for the most part now that I am in year five+ of this widowhood thing. Grief changes thankfully. I am no longer consumed by emptiness and sadness is not my baseline anymore. For me, life is […]
The Grief Graduate
It’s been almost 4 years since Clayton died. I was struck by that fact this week. I’ve been without him for as long as I was in high school. The biggest difference is that my schooling in sadness occurred much faster than K-12. Year 1 felt like being a scared kid starting up class in […]
When Life Intervenes
With rare exceptions, between Thursdays, the day on which I publish here, I let my thoughts rattle around inside my skull, hoping to catch a topic for the coming week. It’s as much about luck as skill, I suppose, like one of those old fashion handheld ball bearing games where you attempt to roll a […]
Tiger, Tiger, Burning Bright . . .
. . . in the 2022 Lunar New Year The float makers in Singapore made a family of Tigers to represent the Year of the Tiger this year. That way all those born in the year of the Tiger are represented, no matter age, gender, and no matter their status in life. Or in death. […]
Choosing Love
Image by Mohamed Nohassi on Unsplash Writing inspired by January’s Monthly Prompt from Megan Devine & Refuge in Grief for Grieflings who have been through her 30-day Writing your Grief Programme https://refugeingrief.com/writing-your-grief/ “For decades, my parents have said they wouldn’t get new dogs or cats when the ones they had died. Their last dog died […]
Coffee and Changes
One Sunday morning in 2019, I stood staring into the cupboard. My eyes saw all the familiar coffee mugs lined up. Though they are inanimate objects, the mugs seem to be shamelessly shouting “pick me” from their distinguished spots on the shelf. *Sigh. Which one should I select. Which mug do I want […]
Snow and Compromise
Yesterday, we got hit with a nor’easter/blizzard here in Massachusetts. Our area got almost a foot of snow (other parts of Mass. less than an hour away got 2 feet and more), plus nasty gusting winds, and massive tides and flooding in beach areas. We live in a house now, that we bought back in […]
Year Two Times Two
Sometimes I’m not sure what to write each week. When that happens (because it’s normal to not have a topic), I take it that the Universe wants me to just look back and see where I am verses where I was. So I decided to look back at the last blog I wrote two years […]
Reflecting on Early Days of Grief
I am realizing that I am now far enough out from my loss to have some perspective on my behaviors and reactions when I was only hours, days, weeks, and months out from it. Isn’t it weird how much we forget and the parts we remember? And I wonder how much of it I remember […]
Small Birds
I like to tend to my small birds. Today I see their birdbath is nearly empty of water. I make a mental note to add a pitcher of water as soon as I finish picking up around the kitchen. Meanwhile, steam continues rising from the bath on this bitterly cold morning. *** The current temperature […]
EACH DEATH COMES AS TEACHER
REST IN PEACE THICH NHAT HANH October 11, 1926 – January 22, 2022 No coming, no going no after, no before. I hold you close. I release you to be free. I am in you And you are in me. Thich Nhat Hanh