The other night, Nick and I were flipping channels on the TV, and we stopped on an episode of “South Park.” It was mid-way through the episode, and it was immediately funny, so we ended up watching it to its completion. A little while later, Nick commented on how much I was laughing out loud […]
Blog
The Final Passing
This week has been full of up and down moments. Life always throws change at you but fast change from a high moment to a low moment and back really takes a toll on you. I certainly need to rest the next couple of days. Not just sleep but rest so I can think, feel […]
Recalling a Friend
A.P. was the imaginary producer behind the imaginary music created by our imaginary air guitar band—the Frazier Thomas Band—by virtue that he was first among us to own a car. We were young, still only semi-responsible. Over the course of several years, we covered a lot of ground together, both literally and figuratively. These friendships […]
Camp Widow Tampa
Day One – Weeping Without any apparent reason, on the morning of Camp Widow Tampa, I awoke weeping. There was no bad dream. No expectation of trouble. Not even a recognition that I was going to a place named Camp Widow. Weeping was the prominent emotion that first day. In searching for reasons, I admitted […]
Homesickness
Main image by Rowan Heuvel on Unsplash In English, when we miss our homeland, we say, “I feel homesick”. In French, when we miss our homeland, we say, “J’ai le mal du pays”. Close enough, but not quite the same. Taken literally, the English version seems just to be about missing one’s “home” (parents, family, […]
Back in the Office
I went back into my office this week for a meeting and to work for a few hours. It was the first time I have been in the building to do actual work since March 12, 2020. In early 2021, I did go in to pack up my little cube so they could shift me […]
Too Tired to “Widow” today …
Michele posted earlier on her FB page about the idea of giving ourselves grace and also giving this post-loss version of ourselves credit for all that we do. So today Im giving myself grace and forgiveness that Im hours late writing this, that Im totally exhausted, and that I dont much feel like “widow-ing” today. […]
Another STep Upwards on this Grief Grise
The thing about a grief journey is that it’s never over. Every step you take onward and upward holds an emotional echo. Some days it’s constantly ringing in your ear and other times it a distant whisper at the bottom of a staircase. Either way you still keep climbing to find the next landing. A […]
Trauma
Isn’t it weird and incredible what we can do if we have no other choice? Our traumatic experiences, before they happened, seemed foreign and impossible. They seemed like things we would not be able to survive. And we definitely never thought we could not only survive but function and do the “tasks” of grief. But […]
Checking All The Boxes
Robyn and I had landed home following our recent trip to Kauai, Hawaii, and I was on the train to the central city where I live. My mind was still flashing to tropical images, but these were images of my first trip to Costa Rica with Lee. It has been twenty-five years or longer. Back […]
Sadness and Joy . . .
. . . side by side: Camp Widow! It is freeing to be in a space where your sadness is welcome—embraced!—and joy sneaks past all the barriers we have created to keep it away. This is Camp Widow. It is beautiful to witness a gaggle of folks huddling in a corner, laughing their heads off, […]
The Miracle of Quality Listening Image by Sammy Williams on Unsplash COVID restrictions are falling away, even in France, which means that I am going out a bit more. This week I had four sorties mid-week – a wine-bar near my home, a premiere at the cinema with Medjool and his daughters, a goodish walk […]