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widow with children

Another New Year

December 31, 2016 by Kaiti Wallace Leave a Comment

I can hear the fire works from last years New Years Eve celebrations. They go off with a bang. Thoughts racing of families watching them with smiles and couples sharing kisses that would seal there love for the year ahead. Last NYE I sat alone on my bedroom floor, with photos sprawled in front of me. A pen in hand, writing letters to John…

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Parenting, Widowed Holidays, Widowed Emotions, Miscellaneous Tagged With: New Beginnings, new year, longing, widow with children, new years eve, sadness, widowed, widow, Celebrations, Holidays, Sorrow

357 Days of a Widows Grief

November 26, 2016 by Kaiti Wallace Leave a Comment

As much as I try to escape it, that day has been on replay in my mind for the past few weeks. The lead up to the one year mark of the day life changed. Terrified at the thought of what emotions this day will bring me. Angry that this day has a place in my life at all. And an overshadowing sadness that engulfs and strangles me with the thought that…

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Parenting, Widowed Emotions Tagged With: widow, grief, Sorrow, longing, widow with children, one year, widower

The Same Changing Tides

November 12, 2016 by Kaiti Wallace Leave a Comment

How many times can I write of the same pain? The same silent cries and the screams without sound. The aches I allow no one to witness and the angry and afraid version of myself no one would believe really exists. It’s a perspective I wish the world knew and a reality no one should have to live with. Choosing to show friends, only the side of…

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Parenting, Widowed Emotions Tagged With: widow, grief, New Normal, emotions, depression, widow with children, young widow

Ticking Clock

October 29, 2016 by Kaiti Wallace Leave a Comment

I vividly remember logging onto Facebook and staring at his messenger icon hoping he would come online. That it was all a misunderstanding and it wasn’t real. Last active… The hours ticked over into days, then into weeks. Now it has almost been 11 months. Remembering it as though it were yesterday. Today I still feel the longing, waiting and…

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Parenting, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Emotions, Miscellaneous Tagged With: grief, future, guilt, happiness, Expectations, healing, emotions, longing, widow with children, young widow, widow

Working With Grief

September 24, 2016 by Kaiti Wallace Leave a Comment

This is my life now, living with grief is a daily battle. It never ends, we just try to adapt to life with grief. Last week I was filled with a new found strength. I used this strength to put more effort into my job and was proud that I felt as though I was finally escaping the fog. That was until I was pulled into a meeting at the end of what I…

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Parenting, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Emotions Tagged With: widow with children, selfhelp, working widow, young widow, anxiety, widow, grief, strength, goals, depression

Our First Father’s Day

September 10, 2016 by Kaiti Wallace Leave a Comment

  For the past month it has been difficult to ignore the father’s day cards that existed on stands in shopping centres almost everywhere I looked. Mentally trying to prepare for the day “it’s just another day, no different from any other”.   When the day arrived I woke with that mindset, it’s just another day. I called my dad to wish him…

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Parenting, Widowed Memories, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Emotions, Miscellaneous Tagged With: widow, widow with children, love, ptsd, life, misshim, future, families, anger, dads, jealousy, special occassions, depression, young widow, Father's Day, anxiety, gifts, memories, longing, widowed, children

My Happiness List

August 27, 2016 by Kaiti Wallace Leave a Comment

Over the weekend I attended John’s son’s swimming lesson. He jumped off the diving board for the first time. Every first brings with it pride for my children along with the inevitable thought, John is missing out or we are missing out on experiencing this first with him. Whichever way you look at it, it’s unfair that he is not here. I left…

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Parenting, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Suddenly Tagged With: Positivity, healing, young widow, suddenly widowed, widow, widow with children, Courage, New Start, loss, grief, anger, happiness, challenges, strength

Home Without Him

August 20, 2016 by Kaiti Wallace Leave a Comment

Moving went as smoothly as possible, I culled a lot of old belongings like toys, baby clothes and little knickknacks. The new apartment is fresh and has a positive ambiance about it. My positive mindset however took its time to catch up. I was undecided on whether or not I would hang John’s clothes in the wardrobe of the new house. As I happily…

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Parenting, Widowed Memories, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Emotions, Miscellaneous Tagged With: widow with children, anxiety, ptsd, memories, miss him, widow, new home, grief, future, challenges, dreams, denial, depression, longing, young widow

Home Is Where The Heart Is

August 13, 2016 by Kaiti Wallace Leave a Comment

I sat in the car alone, across the street from the vacant house we once called home. The house was the only one in the street without lights on. I hoped none of the neighbours would notice me parked and no one did. I sat in silence reminiscing on sweet memories of us taking evening walks under the stars. I imagined we were teenagers again, lying on…

Filed Under: Newly Widowed, Widowed, Widowed Parenting, Widowed Memories, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Emotions, Miscellaneous Tagged With: anxiety, Past life, memories, newly widowed, widow, love, loss, grief, future, death, widow with children, young widow, miss him

Luck O’ The Irish

March 18, 2014 by Kerryl Murray McGlennon Leave a Comment

  Ian loved celebrating his birthday with his friends, so last year, on his birthday, we marked the one year anniversary of him getting sick by going back to the restaurant we had to leave so quickly in 2012.Earlier this week I got a call from one his mates looking to see if I was planning to repeat the lunch for the second anniversary on St…

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Parenting, Widowed Birthdays, Widowed Anniversaries, Widowed Signs from Loved One Tagged With: anniversary, Signs, widow with children, Kerryl Murray McGlennon, signs from loved ones, young widow, birthday

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