Photos my own, taken today It generates a sicky feeling in my tummy. A sinking of my heart. A shortening of my breath. An increase in my heart’s rate. A tensing of my belly. A weakening of my arms’ and legs’ strength. Trembly fingers. This date. 8th of April. Typing it out. Seeing […]
Widowed Milestones
Timelines and Revisions
A few years ago when I was working as a Substitute Teacher, or as some of us say, “Guest Educator” I recall a day spent as a librarian for a local elementary school. In addition to returning and choosing new books, each class spent time on an activity such as word search, cross word […]
5 years.
Today makes 5 years. I can’t wrap my head around it. It feels so big and significant. I know it is just another anniversary year, but 5 feels somehow bigger–like a milestone. In a way, I feel like a lot of the time since Boris died was sort-of robbed from me. The COVID-19 pandemic hit […]
Examining the Light Between Us
In 2021 I was gifted a book written by Laura Lynn Jackson named SIGNS: The Secret Language of the Universe. The author is a psychic medium who penned the New York Times bestseller The Light Between Us: Stories from Heaven, Lessons for the Living. I found Laura Lynne unique among other mediums I’d met. Before […]
The Body Remembers – Again
This morning I awoke at exactly 4h00. It’s not entirely uncommon that I am awake around that time. But to awaken at exactly 4h00. On 30th March. The body remembers. Nineteen years ago, at that very moment, I woke up. I needed the loo. As in to poo. And I knew. Because late […]
Seeing Our Way Through
Last week I took my one and a half year old pup, Quint, to the Animal Eye Clinic in Jacksonville, Florida, for an official vision assessment. Not surprisingly, the specialist confirmed that Quint’s vision was severely impaired due to detached retinas in both eyes and a tear in one. He also confirmed that his condition […]
What Grows On
My last two posts have focused on the inner workings and transformation of house, home and human in the wake of profound loss. It was so gratifying to see my post, “Staying in Place”, written earlier this month recently featured on the Facebook Page of Soaring Spirits, International, and to see it appreciated by those […]
Camp Widow Serendipity . . .
… a story. It was September of 2022 in Denver at the local community college. A widow, finding no support options in Mississippi, arrives via a road trip where Soaring Spirits is offering a one-day program for widowed people. What was she thinking when she arrived? She did not know a soul and discovered the […]
Our Anniversary, Number 16 and Number 2
Friday would have been our 16th wedding anniversary and it’s the 2nd one he’s missed. The last two years I have intentionally been away from home on St. Patrick’s Day. Last year, the kids and I went to Florida to visit my parents. This year we spent a long weekend in the Ozarks with […]
Growing in Circles
Last Saturday I wrote about staying in place after losing a spouse or significant other. It isn’t easy to stay in a home that looks the same to everyone else, but doesn’t feel the same to the one who remains in that space alone. But many choose to remain in place, attempting to create a […]
How Lucky Are We?
The Wonder of a Camp for Widowed People (the sequel) It is truly a wonder that a camp for widowed people exists! In October 2021, after I attended my first camp, I wrote about it here. This is the sequel. Camp Widow is a safe place created by widowed people for widowed people. A place […]
Staying in Place
I remember the day I drove home from the hospital up in Brunswick, Georgia, with the hard realization that Rich would never be walking up to our front door again. That is a sobering and defining moment. During the 3 weeks he’d spent in the ICU, each drive home was filled with a glimmer of […]