As a widower, I make the effort to cultivate my friendships and acquaintances. By doing so I hope to avoid the loneliness and disconnection that seems to be pervasive. The unfavorable outcomes of loneliness are numerous. Loneliness is associated with depression and other forms of mental illness, of course. It also is a risk factor […]
Widowed Effect on Family/Friends
A Life Well-lived
Last Saturday, at 2:45am I received a phone call. I could tell by the sender that it brought the inevitable news that my father had passed. My dad had been under hospice care for approximately three weeks, and although the circumstances of their passings differed, it struck me that both he and Rich had […]
The Importance of Staying Connected
Robyn and I are going out of town on Friday to visit my old and dear friends, Donna and Craig, whom from time to time I have mentioned in these posts. Yet, as a result, I won’t be attending Joe’s upcoming show at a prime music venue here, also scheduled on Friday. Joe, who is […]
Just because I “know” doesn’t mean I “remember”
Image of Ground Zero Memorial by Oleg Illarionov on Unsplash It’s a tricky thing, supporting others who have experienced great loss. Even when you yourself have experienced great loss. Even when you have experienced the “same” great loss, dammit. It’s a tricky thing because of so many tricky things. Tricky things like the natural human […]
Deathiversary Two
Last week was a heavy week for me. Thursday marked two years since Tony died by suicide, leaving behind unanswered questions and heartache. These are the waves of grief we see coming and we can almost prepare for them. Last Monday, I sent the kids to school, wrote my blog, and then let the sadness […]
Joy and Melancholy
Yesterday was my oldest son’s birthday. This Thursday will mark two years since Tony’s death. It is hard to hold both of those dates in my heart so close together. The date that we became parents for the first time with the date we all lost him. Joy and melancholy fold in on themselves. This […]
No Small Moments
Due to family matters, I was unable to write a new post this week. I went back to my former dog-writing blog site I’d maintained for over ten years on WordPress and perused my post archives and came upon one I’d composed after the passing of my sister, Manette. As it pertains on how we […]
Timelines and Revisions
A few years ago when I was working as a Substitute Teacher, or as some of us say, “Guest Educator” I recall a day spent as a librarian for a local elementary school. In addition to returning and choosing new books, each class spent time on an activity such as word search, cross word […]
NNTR and other attempts to influence language
Image by i-am_nah on Unsplash Back in the 1980s, and possibly into the 1990s, I was quite an avid reader of two “wimmin’s magazines” – Company and Cosmopolitan. I just looked up to see if they still exist – they do. But I am curious how I ever found any of it interesting. Perhaps it […]
Art Reflects Life
It’s not surprising that things hit differently once we are widowed, but sometimes it’s still unexpected. In 2019, I excitedly ordered tickets to Hamilton when it was coming through on tour. Tony didn’t love the theatre like I did, but he put up with a show every now and then because he loved me. My […]
“Pas Voulu Mais Choisi”
Image by Josue Michel on Unsplash 18 March 2023 I have just come back from my Saturday morning swim with the Masters. When I say, “with the Masters”, I speak rather relatively. Yes, I am part of the Masters group, and so get access to special opening times, long before the sun rises. On Saturdays […]
Our Anniversary, Number 16 and Number 2
Friday would have been our 16th wedding anniversary and it’s the 2nd one he’s missed. The last two years I have intentionally been away from home on St. Patrick’s Day. Last year, the kids and I went to Florida to visit my parents. This year we spent a long weekend in the Ozarks with […]