My team at work kicks off the week with a quick meeting almost every Monday morning. It’s a quick 15-minute call where we cover the highlights of the upcoming week and who has a birthday or anniversary. Last week was our first one of the new year, and we all expected welcome back pleasantries. Instead, […]
Widowed Effect on Family/Friends
Pages of Grief
Last night I finished the book Maame by Jessica George. (Warning: Spoilers ahead if it’s on your To Be Read list.) The book follows Maddie, who is trying to find herself at 25 when her father dies from complications related to Parkinsons. She is at an age where she is working through finding a career […]
Funeral Attendance
Today I went to a funeral for friend whose mom passed away. I have known this friend since high school, and I think I even crashed on the couch in their basement once. I know some people avoid almost all future funerals after losing their partner. Admittedly, some of them are easier to sit through […]
Passing Holiday Milestones to Better Days Ahead
Just a few days ago, an archived Facebook photo from 2021 that I’d posted the Thanksgiving weekend four weeks after Rich’s passing, appeared in my Feed. At that time, my elderly mother had come to stay with me and although I truly wasn’t into holiday decorating, for her sake, I did. That memory made […]
Northern Climbs
Last weekend I had an inspirational visit to New England, the origin of my late father’s family, of French Canadian descent. As a kid, most holidays found my family loading up the car for another trek from New Jersey to Massachusettes where my siblings and I made fun of the accents of 42 our first […]
Another Bloody Birthday
Yesterday was Tony’s birthday. He should have been turning 48, but he is forever 43. I actually double checked myself because 48 didn’t sound right. He was born two years before me so keeping track of his age is easy. Yet still I questioned if that number was right. Five birthdays we’ve missed his presence […]
When Longtime Traditions Change
Yesterday, I facilitated a parol making workshop for a large group of Filipinos, some I have known since I was a child. Parols are a traditional, Philippine lantern displayed during the holiday season, and made of capiz shells. OUR homemade carols, however, are made of bamboo sticks and cellophane paper. Years ago, I would bring […]
Pondering Hope
Then and Now In the early days of losing my husband of 52 years, I was in shock. A fog. It lasted a full year and as time moved on, I saw myself clinging to optimism. I’m a hopeless optimist and the problem in that is that sometimes I avoid feeling my feelings in the […]
BBQ Community
Living in the Midwest, BBQ is a food group and a hobby. I’ve shared before that Tony loved to smoke and had a BBQ team. He also shared that love with others and built a community of competitors. One of the people he drew into that world was his boss. A few weeks ago, his […]
Magical Powers
Today I opened an assignment one of my kids participated in for school. The question posed to these middle schoolers was: If you had to choose one magic power for the rest of your life, what would it be? Why would you choose this power? This assignment was completed on a discussion board of sorts, […]
Family Business
I hadn’t seen Paul and Joanne since their grandson’s birthday party in July, so I was looking forward to having lunch together this past Wednesday. They were both looking fit, I thought, having obviously lost weight since our last encounter. I made a mental note that each had left a few forkfuls of food on […]
I No Longer Need My / Our Burial Plot
My close friend, J’s, husband passed away a few years ago. Lynn and I were very close to them, and when we would go out, we all joked that people would think the “couples” in our group were actually J and I, and Lynn and my friend’s husband. We just naturally would pair off when […]











