Today I opened an assignment one of my kids participated in for school. The question posed to these middle schoolers was: If you had to choose one magic power for the rest of your life, what would it be? Why would you choose this power?

This assignment was completed on a discussion board of sorts, so you could see everyone’s answers and the kids could reply to each other. In the 6 pages of responses, I saw things like the ability to teleport, fly, talk to animals, conjure money, or hear people’s thoughts. One response I found particularly entertaining was a girl who wanted to be able to mute/unmute others because she finds people annoying. All of these responses were exactly what I’d imagine most 11- and 12-year-old kids would ideate after reading Percy Jackson.

In all the pages I read, there was one response that wasn’t like anyone else’s. My son wrote, he wished he had to the power to bring people back to life because his dad died. I almost knew this would be his response before I found it.

He knows a little more about life, love, and loss than most of his peers. It makes me sad that in this way, he had to grow up so early. But I’m also proud of him for being brave enough to write his feelings down in an open forum. Owning your grief and happiness is hard work. We don’t always get it right, but he’s doing a pretty great job if you ask me.

I try to model for my kids that it’s okay to be happy and sad. We can talk about death and make questionable dark jokes. If you need a break from grief, we can do that too. We all deserve the freedom and space to open up how and when we are ready. Today was a reminder that our kids need the same emotional space to grow as we do.

I’m right there with him on hypothetical magical powers though. We’re bringing Tony back, as long as it’s not a Stephen King, Pet Cemetery situation. (dark humor, sorry-ish)