Earlier this week a few of my cousins had texted me about my birthday plans. I had completely forgotten that my birthday was coming up. I had been so focused on the twins and Erik’s birthday that I had forgotten that mine was the same month. Since Erik’s passing, I haven’t really been into celebrating […]
Widowed Effect on Family/Friends
Some Days Are Worse Than Others
Just ask Alexander! A boy named Alexander had a lot to say about this: I went to sleep with gum in my mouth and now there’s gum in my hair and when I got out of bed this morning, I tripped on the skateboard and by mistake I dropped my sweater in the sink while […]
Finding Family
Reunions of any kind can stir up all kinds of thoughts and feelings – happiness, nostalgia, a desire to connect, and inevitably sadness due to the fact that reunions can remind us of those who are no longer here with us. My parents met in New Jersey – my mom a coal miner’s daughter […]
2800 A Day
On July 20th, I walked out of Michele Neff Hernandez’s keynote address at Camp Widow in San Diego to a text message indicating bad news back home. Thankfully, the text indicated my kids were okay. As I rode the escalator to a quieter part of the hotel my mind raced through scenarios of what the […]
Four Words
It’s time for me to prep for Camp Widow in San Diego this week. There are lots of tasks to get myself ready to be away from home for almost 5 days. Packing myself, scheduling the kids with grandparents, lining out their schedules, the list goes on. Last week, I received a survey from Soaring […]
July Blues
Just like clockwork, another July rolls around. As each year passes, the important dates seem to hold more value as we get further from when Erik was here. July holds so much significance for us. July 2nd of the year Erik passed was supposed to be our “Christmas in July” vow renewal. These important dates […]
That Twin Inevitable Heartbreak
As a widow, we hear plenty of platitudes. One of them being ‘time will heal all’. It’s one that I truly dislike and still makes me cringe mostly because I don’t believe it’s true. I don’t believe that time will heal becoming a widow. I don’t think anything will be able to heal that. I […]
A Family Vacation
Last week I was on vacation with my children and my late husband’s family. My in-laws organized the trip as an early celebration for their 50th wedding anniversary. We spent 6 days in the Outer Banks with Tony’s parents and his sister’s family. The cousins had fun together bouncing between the beach and the pool […]
Brewing Intuition
Last Sunday I woke up in California ready to head home after spending an incredible weekend with a group of widow friends. Being a travel day, the first thing I did was check my flights. Both flights were delayed by 15 minutes. I tried to go back to sleep but something told me to keep […]
The Spirit of Weddings
This past weekend the twins and I had the privilege of being part of my cousin’s wedding. She’s one of my best friends and my soul sister. I found that weddings have been particularly hard since Erik’s passing. It’s always a harsh reminder that the person we have lost is not there with us. But […]
Going Home
My friend, Amy, sent me photos of the house and property she recently made an offer to purchase. It’s several hours removed from the city we both currently call home, located in the small town where she was raised. Amy’s mother died a year or two back but her father never left and resides there […]
An Eye Opener:
Worldwide Widowed Communities What took me to stories about widowed folk around the world? Just returned from a mini-vacay where I had no responsibilities other than showing up for the fun. Arriving home to my regular routine, settling into the normal challenges of my post-Dan-life, I found myself wondering about the lives of […]