I remember the day I drove home from the hospital up in Brunswick, Georgia, with the hard realization that Rich would never be walking up to our front door again. That is a sobering and defining moment. During the 3 weeks he’d spent in the ICU, each drive home was filled with a glimmer of […]
Blog
Another Birthday Letter to Boris
Boris, Today you should be turning 32. I feel like I need to catch you up on what life is like right now, on what would be your 32nd birthday, but I kind of feel like you already know? (I am not really sure how the Other Side/Heaven works) Long story short, the world is […]
Hiking With Some Friends Across Desert Mountains
It’s sunny and clear, but still cool on this late winter morning when Linda, Ross, and I arrive at the trailhead parking lot in Ross’ car. Lola and I were the first to arrive at Ross and Janet’s house; Bob and Linda arrive a few minutes later. While Bob and Janet remain behind for health […]
Transformation
Days of the “goo” were common, in the first days of grief in spring 2021. Goo refers to what happens to caterpillars after they close themselves up in a cocoon. They liquify and live in the liminal space of “no longer this” and “not yet that” — I relate to those words. The transformation that […]
Love Is Not Always Enough
Image by freestocks on Unsplash Last night I saw “The Son”, which I knew would be a hard film. (** Spoiler Alerts ** Don’t read if you want to see the film **) I knew from the trailer that it was about teenage struggle – possibly linked to mental health issues related to loss, gender- […]
Exercise as Self Care
Why is it so hard to prioritize ourselves and our health? Before Tony passed, I had started a workout routine that I enjoyed. It was the first time since having kids that I had started one and was sticking to it. The day he passed was the 79th day in a row that I had […]
Tired of Winter
A fitting re-post from a year ago! Yesterday, we got hit with a nor’easter/blizzard here in Massachusetts. Our area got almost a foot of snow (other parts of Mass. less than an hour away got 2 feet and more), plus nasty gusting winds, and massive tides and flooding in beach areas. We live in a […]
March-ing Forth with The Memory Keepers
February was a busy time on several fronts. The local Art Gala that had taken months of committee work and preparation for me as an organizer and participating artist was a great success. The hard work, anxiety and anticipation over. Just a few days later, my brother and his wife arrived in Georgia for a […]
New Grief Group
Last week I started going to a grief group. It is led by the therapist I have been seeing for several months, and she encouraged me to join it. I was a little hesitant because I was not sure how helpful it will be, but I am feeling like I need the extra support. March […]
Putting the Band Back Together
This week has featured non-stop socializing. For one week, my dear friends, Bob and Linda, are visiting here from Ohio. Linda was Lee’s best friend. My friendship with Bob goes back to our days in high school. Bob’s doctors have given him a clean bill for the moment, opening a travel window for him and […]
Working Woman Still
When Dan was alive he used to tell me I worked too hard. The word “work” mostly referred to one or another creative project in addition to my professional job. He was right. I don’t have great boundaries sometimes and the middle of the night, or the wee hours of the morning, are when I […]
Conversations Without Spaces Erase Entire Lives
Main image by Red Zeppelin on Unsplash I was invited for dinner at a friend’s house last night. Medjool was also invited and joined. We so rarely get invited out as a couple. His friends invite him out, and invariably he goes without me. My friends invite me out, but without inviting him. Actually, no […]