September is Suicide Prevention Month, and the 10th, is World Suicide Prevention Day. Over the years my attitude towards these attempts to bring awareness has evolved. In a lot of ways, it has transformed with my grief. The first year, it made me angry. Prevention? Seriously? How could I have prevented something he kept hidden […]
Widowed
The Gifts in the First Year of Widowhood that Shape the Grief Journey
I was contacted by a long time friend this week asking for resources for a widow client he was working with. I am sure many of us widows are asked similar questions, or asked if we would be willing to talk with someone who is recently widowed and may need to connect with another widow. […]
“It’s aloneness rather than loneliness”
I spent way too much time mindlessly scrolling instagram last week. I spend more time there than any other social media platform simply because I follow a lot of just plain old fun accounts as well as art and music and people out in the world doing nice things. There is one account I follow […]
The Power of Listening
on our path toward healing Part 1 of a series focusing on the benefits of a protected deep listening experience. What is non-judgmental listening? It’s an integral piece of creating an authentic community where everyone feels seen and heard. A safe place to grow. The gift of non-judgmental listening, within a safe space, changed my […]
Curiosity of 5 Year Olds
“Are you going to die, Mama?” Those words cut through me like a knife as my entire body went motionless. I looked at that sweet face that was looking back at me, not realizing the impact her question had on me. My mind blanked for a second, not knowing how to answer back, and then […]
An Insightful Gift
Last weekend I got to spend time with one of Tony’s best guy friends. He was the best man at our wedding level bestie and someone we have both been friends with since high school. We don’t get to see each other often because life is busy when you each have 3 kids at home. […]
I Saw You There
happy birthday, my love! your 75th year took me back to when we were first wed and your dad being 50 seemed so old! i teased him calling him “half-a-century” old and he reciprocated when I turned 25 by calling me a “quarter-century” old :)) writing this story reminds me of my luck […]
The Art of Living in the Moment
On a daily basis, most of us have a lot to do. There’s work, there’s taking care of other humans (kids, parents, etc.), there’s all the daily personal to-do’s. And there is only a limited amount of time to do it all. For the last three months, I’ve been “grinding”, as they say. No, I […]
Widowhood Lessons
From a Labrador Retriever Awakened by my pet at 3:00am, I moan…. “Indy. . .” “Seriously?” A refrain I speak to my pet and my widowed life regularly. On par with life, her wee-hour pee evolves, occasionally, into something more complicated if a possum, racoon, or other nighttime critter makes an appearance. This […]
“I want to give your kids the world.”
A repost! As the twins’ birthday trip nears I have found myself caught in a whirlwind of emotions. More so than normal. Any time I’m getting ready for a trip I find myself thinking of Erik more often than I already do. So why do I continue to do it? Because traveling also makes me […]
Dead People Everywhere
It’s easy to get caught up in our own losses and forget that death impacts everyone. You look around at the grocery store and think you are the only widow buying hamburgers you’ll probably burn again. At the Dr’s office, it’s easy to assume the rest of the dads are at work. On vacation, every […]
Reminders
This past week I got 2 pieces of junk mail addressed to Mario. It doesn’t happen as often as it did, but considering he’s been gone for 4 and half years now, you’d think I would get no mail in his name. As any widowed person knows, stuff like this is a reminder of all […]