The other week, we stopped by a field of sunflowers on our way home. This isn’t just any field of sunflowers… it is a memorial called Prayers from Maria. Each year for the past five years, this field has been planted with hundreds of sunflowers. Towards the end of every summer, they bloom into their full glory. I’ve seen this covered on the…
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The Grief Summit
I haven’t written in a couple of weeks. I could say I’ve been busy but really it is because I didn’t feel inspired to write. Writing for me is very specific. I have to feel I need to write to portray an aspect of my life that might help another. I don’t want to just write anything to have something written. There is an emptiness to that…
Money Woes
I’m really broke. Again. I’m really tired of being broke. I’m really tired of talking about being broke. I’m really tired of typing and writing about being broke. Even when my husband Don was alive, we struggled financially. Everyday. But he worked and I worked, and we helped each other out. He started helping me out way before he moved in with me.
Broken Chain
I was recently given a beautiful cross with the poem below. It hit home. Little I knew that morning. God was going to call your name. In life we loved you dearly, in death we do the same. It broke our hearts to lose you. You did not go alone, for part of me went with you, the day God called you home. You left us beautiful memories. Your…
Roads, Places, and Memories~
70. 20. 10. 65. 85. 60. 1. East to west to north to south and back again. The Oregon coast. The road to the Keys. New England. The Southwest. Deep South. Roads and directions and places and, most of all…memories.We…you and I…were everywhere together. I travel to as many places, the same roads as we did. I don’t go to places though. I don’t go…
In The Past 24 Hours…
In the past 24 hours… …I collected my youngest daughter’s “personal effects” from the clinic she’d been attending …I was told that her death by suicide most probably wasn’t pre-meditated, but an “on the spur of the moment” action …I learned that my baby girl had been terrified at the possibility of being a carrier for Lynch…
Your Touch
Dear Mike, I miss your touch desperately. When you were alive my skin knew your touch by heart. I knew how you felt. I knew that the stubble on your cheeks wasn’t that rough; Your shoulders were wide and your chest was solid. Your hands were thick and strong. I remember that your nails were always kept cut short because you thought it…
Engagement from Two Sides
Today is a beginning of sorts. For the past few years, Mike and I have written for Soaring Spirits on separate days and will be moving to sharing Sundays now. For anyone who doesn’t know our story, we are both widowed and now engaged to one another. We met in Tampa at Camp Widow in 2015 and have been dating since. The idea to share a day seemed…
Doing It All
My hands hurt from the day from carrying heaving boxes and fixing things around the house. Today, I had to build my little girl a toy box. I will say it took me some time, but I got it done correctly. My back hurts from all the lifting I did, in loading and unloading Costco groceries in 110-degree weather. I miss the days where I had my husband and…
Movies in my Life~
It seems that my imagination…what goes on in my mind to help me manage this life…has ramped up. Almost any situation I encounter has a counterpart from various movies I’ve watched over the years. The big picture of all of this is me in the middle of a romantic comedy. I’ve always loved watching romcoms. Chuck used to watch them with me.Within…
Clutching On To Solo-Parenting
These last few days have been a mad rush. I accompanied my “now youngest” daughter Megan, who is 18, to start university in the middle of the UK. We live in France, so it’s a bit of a schlep, and since we take a flight, there’s a limit to what we can carry. Furnishing her student digs, then, becomes a race against time and my credit card’s…
La Rentrée
In France, where I live, early September, with its “back to school and back to work” is known as “la rentrée”. This week is “la rentrée”. Schools go back. Three-year olds begin pre-school, known here as “Maternelle”. Six-year olds begin primary/”Primaire”. Eleven-year olds begin secondary, known as “Collège”, and…