I can’t deny that really, since Drew died, life has just never gotten back to being “easy” or “effortless” in the way it was back before he died. Of course, I don’t ever remember anyone saying that life gets easier as you get older. Doesn’t seem like the way it ever goes… just that we get better at handling things over time. That doesn’t mean it isn’t just as beautiful when life is challenging, because it sure as hell is. It just isn’t as simple.
It’s never easy to say goodbye… whether 5 months, 5 years, or 15 years. All I can look forward to is knowing that soon she’ll be able to peacefully rest finally, without confusion, or fear. Just peace.
I have so much fear of becoming widowed again. Some days, that fear is louder than others… like anticipating my own personal asteroid out there that is going to crash into me on some unknown date in the future, creating a private apocalypse all over again.
Mike and Sarah share Sunday posts, as they are two widows who are in a new relationship together. Today’s post is from Mike: Hey Babe, I’m writing this to you a few day’s belated. It’s been 6 years now since the last time Shelby or I was able to say “Happy Birthday” to your […]
This year has meant a lot of detours for many. For all of us who are widowed, the metaphor of a detour is a bold one… the idea of the road being closed ahead and suddenly we are to choose a new direction…
When Drew died, I gathered all the support I could muster and I do truly believe it helped me to navigate the pain. Grief has taught me not to wait until there is a raging storm, but instead to seek support out when the clouds first begin to thicken.
What happened instead is that an opening was made, for that voice to come back and haunt me. That voice that tells me I am cursed in some way from ever having those milestone, big, beautiful moments in my life.
I did NOT cancel the Bed & Breakfast that was supposed to be for our wedding night. I did NOT cancel the wedding cake either. I am celebrating my relationship on this day no matter what – and that means CAKE dammit.
Hey bud, You know, there are a lot of coincidental similarities between you and I. I mean, even at age 6, I was fascinated by flight (spaceflight specifically, at the time), visiting Kennedy space center, and the US air force museum. I enlisted in the Marine Corps at 17, and guess where I ended […]
Eight years ago today my world changed forever, suddenly, and in ways I couldn’t have imagined…
Yesterday was our anniversary. Next week, the 8th anniversary of his death. That’s a day that a lot of people still remember. But yesterday… no one else really remembers…
I’ll admit his sudden absence after having been home 24/7 for the past few months definitely has the triggers talking. It’s as if the widow part of me is suddenly on high alert because a person is here less than normal and it doesn’t compute. It only knows to be worrying that this means death and pain are coming.