I took a last-minute vacation day last week to spend the day alone. The decision came after looking at the calendar and realizing almost every day between now and the end of school is occupied with kid activities. Once school is over, I’ll have three feral boys in my space all day, every day. I […]
Widowed and Healing
My Evolving Relationship with Old Routines
I started running again the past week. My usual route, 3 miles around the lake a few minutes from my house, and the neighborhood I grew up in. This has been my usual nightly running route on and off for the past 15+ years, though it’s a trail I have been traversing since I was […]
The Liminal Space
Of Loss I’m writing today from a disoriented space of transition. A liminal space. It is said that grief is such a place. The location of disorientation today is loss. It is a practical loss; yet, still a condition worthy of discussion for those in grief. Prior to losing Dan, I would have criticized myself […]
Back to Therapy
In response to feeling overwhelmed lately, I have been buying books and exploring therapy options. It started with ‘The Let Them Theory’ by Mel Robbins a few months ago and I wrote a post on that. Now I’m reading ‘What Happened To You?’ by Bruce D. Perry, M.D., Ph.D. and Oprah Winfrey. I have made […]
Thinking of Those
Arriving in Edmonds Tomorrow Remembering Camp Widow Denver Gives Me Hope. I am packing and remembering. I’m recalling a tender conversation with a woman under the stairwell. She drove 18 hours to see if Camp Widow could help her manage the grief. What can possibly help when our person is gone? When facing a […]
The Living Bucketlist
What a world. The twins and I have been on back-to-back trips for the last few months. We recently just got back this past Saturday from a trip to Japan and South Korea and wow, what a trip it was. It was another bucketlist item that Erik and I had. As I continue to travel […]
Seasonal Awareness
My Awareness Calendar reminds me that April, among other things, contains the Awareness Observances of Adopt a Greyhound Month, Global Volunteer Month, Library Snapshot Month, National Pet Month, and Couple Appreciation Month. This is just a few from a field of 100 plus observances currently on record! But for the purposes of this column, I […]
Day in Review
On the 4th Year of Re-membering A Day in Review Writing this post is the last ritual of a day of re-membering the life of Dan Neff. Beloved husband, papa, and grandfather. Greatly missed by many. A good man. After an online workshop in the morning, I went to the cemetery to find our […]
You are “So Strong”
Winn-ie, the tiny puppy I “acquired” during a shopping trip to Winn Dixie has proven to be a smart, sweet and rough and tumble little cutie. She and my big dog, Jackson, continue to forge an adorable bond and our other two older dogs have learned to tolerate the antics of this energetic pup. Recently, […]
Sixteen increments of 90 days
= A Very Long Time In just 13 days we arrive at the fourth anniversary of Dan’s death. Recently, I realized that there have been sixteen “90 day increments” since saying goodbye to my beloved. To honor this realization, I reposted my July 14th blog which I wrote exactly 90 days after his death. My […]
Squad Goals
A week ago, I was wrapping up a long weekend with my widow squad. Ten of us, who over the last 4 years, built a bond at Camp Widow San Diego. The Camp Widow format change was our catalyst to adjust how we show up for each other. For us, Camp had begun to serve […]
8 Ways My Perimenopause Journey Reminds Me of My Grief Journey
Experiencing the Sacred Journey of Perimenopause is reminding me of when I began the Sacred Journey of Grief… 1) The FATIGUE… I’m a runner, used to do several half marathons a year. Since I began the Perimenopause, I suddenly get sooo tired – mentally and emotionally, as well as physically. In the middle of a […]