Where is joy? I’m grateful to be alive this day to breathe in air to witness beauty and to walk barefooted upon the earth. Grief’s feeling cycles remind me that I am alive. The values which form the backbone of my existence remind me to pay attention. Where does joy reside? […]
Widowed and Healing
Non “Magical Thinking”
For years after Lynn passed, I never shied away from “hard feelings” ie: sadness, anger, exhaustion, confusion, etc. If a feeling came along, I gave it a place to stay as long as it needed to. I had no filter with people either. If people asked “how was I doing,” I matter of factly told […]
On Sunflowers
A Medicine for Joy? part one of a three-part meditation on joy Ah Sun-flower! weary of time, Who countest the steps of the Sun: Seeking after that sweet golden clime Where the travellers journey is done. Where the Youth pined away with desire, And the pale Virgin shrouded in snow: Arise from their graves […]
It’s a “Win-Win” Situation
As I relayed in a previous post, at the tail-end of March I welcomed a tiny 5 lb. pup into our pack. Since then, she has quadrupled in weight and at four months she is just a about 20 lbs. It’s noted that if you double the weight of a 4 month-old puppy, you can […]
A Poet’s Wisdom
death’s sting is in my heart and mind and memories When I think of death, and of late the idea has come with alarming frequency, I seem at peace with the idea that a day will dawn when I will no longer be among those living in this valley of strange humors. I […]
Party Hostess
Tony and I always loved opening our home and hosting friends. We hosted both large and small gatherings, finding joy in both kinds of camaraderie. Since his passing, I haven’t hosted as much as we used to. It’s hard to be a solo parent, juggling all that comes with that, and finding the time to […]
Resting in Peace
Our Own Way We wish for our person to rest in peace—what about us? Are there moments of peace that we create for ourselves? Grief follows us like a shadow. No matter where we turn it can show up. Up close and personal. First thing in the morning, as we stretch from the night’s […]
Sundays are the Most Nostalgic
Sunday afternoons are sometimes still the most nostalgic and bittersweet times. I frequently have packed weekends, often a little too “peopley.” And it is a relief to get to Sunday evening, to pause, rest, and get into that somewhat resistant mindset of, “the weekend is over and Monday is looming.” My bones still remember with […]
A 2012 Facebook Post . . .
. . . how I’m doing on that list. Some 13 years past, the Facebook posts saved as “memories” are interesting to read. My Grandmother passed away at 83 on Holy Saturday. My Aunt Cissie passed away at 99 on Good Friday (April 6, 2012 at 5am). That leaves Easter Sunday for me at 105…when […]
Friendship is an Honor
Saturday, I had the pleasure of catching up with two of my friends from college. One friend lives locally but we don’t see each other nearly often as we should. My other friend lives in a coastal city out east. I hadn’t seen her in 3 years, but they hadn’t seen each other in 10 […]
A Car as a Time Capsule
Lynn and I met a year before we were officially a couple. For a year, we steadily became closer friends. (Honestly, I was secretly dating her for that year, but she didn’t know it…) Lynn bought a brand new, Silver, 2005 Toyota Scion xA that year. Her Golden Retriever had passed away shortly before she […]
The Season of Time
What is time, anyway? Time is how we measure and make sense of change. At its core, time is a concept we use to track the sequence and duration of events. It’s how we understand that one thing happens before or after another and how long things last. -Chatgpt Time is both strict and magical. […]