Lynn was big on having (over the counter) meds on hand – allergy, flu, tummy ache, headache, etc. She had them organized in plastic bags that she carefully labeled with what they were for. I have struggled all these years with clutter cleaning, getting-rid-of, holding onto things until I am ready to let them go, […]
Widowed and Healing
Navigating the “Tail” of the Timeline
On Thursday, October 9, Quint, my quirky Malti-poo, turned four years old. Quint has played an integral role in my movement, and voyage, forward after the passing of my husband, Rich. On October 8, 2021, I brought Rich to the local ER after a several days of of him not feeling well after we’d returned […]
After the Major Transition of Loss
Life Brings Other Transitions I joined the Widow’s Voice team about two months into my loss. Each writer (one for each day of the week) writes about whatever is relevant in their life that week. For about two months now, I have been in a state of transition. Preparing my home for a tenant involved […]
Magical Powers
Today I opened an assignment one of my kids participated in for school. The question posed to these middle schoolers was: If you had to choose one magic power for the rest of your life, what would it be? Why would you choose this power? This assignment was completed on a discussion board of sorts, […]
Holding Up a Mirror
To Things Previously Unseen FILM AS MEDICINE I discovered something new… when watching a favorite film recently. Its title is perfect—The Meddler, with Susan Sarandon—but the first time I watched it, I didn’t agree. The film opens directly into loneliness. Marnie, the protagonist, lies in her bed staring at the ceiling fan. A feeling hangs […]
I No Longer Need My / Our Burial Plot
My close friend, J’s, husband passed away a few years ago. Lynn and I were very close to them, and when we would go out, we all joked that people would think the “couples” in our group were actually J and I, and Lynn and my friend’s husband. We just naturally would pair off when […]
Happily Accepting the “Silver” Medal
This weekend marks what would’ve been my 29th Wedding Anniversary, not the 30th that I mentioned in my last post. It gave me a little laugh when I realized my widowed brain error. 29th, or 30th, no matter, it’s a bittersweet occasion, but one to always honor. So many who shared our special day, and […]
Pausing in the Badlands
A Day in the Life of a BadA** Widow Tiny pause in the series for a Badass widow story. Long story, but I found out I can leave two bags of refuse each day at the dump! I went! A kind soul at the landfill office window gave me the required orange vest to […]
Faded Marks
You know those restaurants that give you sharpies to write on the walls? So, you are encouraged to leave your mark on the establishment. We have one of those places close by. For awhile it was a staple breakfast spot for our family. It was a place that Tony loved. The food was over the […]
The Premise of a Protected Sharing Space
The Container Part 2 of a series focusing on the benefits of a protected deep listening experience. It’s interesting which memories last the test of time in my brain. They are most often “stories” whose meanings remain current years later. This one lives in me from nearly 50 years ago. The concept of safe […]
September
September is Suicide Prevention Month, and the 10th, is World Suicide Prevention Day. Over the years my attitude towards these attempts to bring awareness has evolved. In a lot of ways, it has transformed with my grief. The first year, it made me angry. Prevention? Seriously? How could I have prevented something he kept hidden […]
The Gifts in the First Year of Widowhood that Shape the Grief Journey
I was contacted by a long time friend this week asking for resources for a widow client he was working with. I am sure many of us widows are asked similar questions, or asked if we would be willing to talk with someone who is recently widowed and may need to connect with another widow. […]