If I excel at anything(And I deliberately use the word “excel”)It is that I practise Extreme Self-CareExtremeSelfCareI am proud of my skill and expertiseHaughty, maybe even arrogantFor without it I too would surely have diedAnd what use is yet another Premature death?None whatsoever Here are some of my pet phrasesAnd if not daily, then Weekly…
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Broken Chain
I was recently given a beautiful cross with the poem below. It hit home. Little I knew that morning. God was going to call your name. In life we loved you dearly, in death we do the same. It broke our hearts to lose you. You did not go alone, for part of me went with you, the day God called you home. You left us beautiful memories. Your…
Its About You
For a few years now, I have been writing in this blog each Friday. I love doing it. But there are times when I feel almost selfish. Times when I get bored with my own words and thoughts. I start thinking: “ENOUGH ALREADY about ME!!! Im tired of talking about me!!!” But that is how writing feels. When you are in the moment of writing, it…
The Stress of Being Stressed
This will not be a long post today. I apoligize. I think I just spelled that word wrong. I apoligize for that too. Recently, I got my Real Estate license. Also recently, some very big things have happened that affect my life greatly. Things have changed and altered. The future I was looking toward, finally, now has a different view. Its…
Grateful to Laugh
Last night I was hanging out with my boyfriend of 2 years, and we found ourselves laughing a lot together. Its not unusual for us to laugh together, but lately, we have been going through an extremely hard time , so laughing together felt like a gigantic sigh. A huge relief. Something needed. Something perhaps lost inside all of the stress,…
In Between …
At eight years post-loss, I am somewhere different than ever before, and yet, not quite where I would like to be. I am well past the soul-crushing, hopeless feelings of everyday existence. And still, there are days where my heart feels like it has stopped beating, or like there is a large boulder sitting on it, temporarily. At eight…
Paying Grief Forward
It has been eight years since my husband’s sudden death. In the beginning, there were days where I honestly didnt see myself ever living a life with meaning again. I didnt think I could feel joy again. I didnt know if it would be possible to take the pain and turn it into something that might help others. I didnt have the energy or the…
Underpinnings
When Mike died I felt my foundation shift and collapse. I buried him, but it was me who was buried alive by the wreckage of our dilapitdated life. For a long time I thought that maybe if I stood still he’d come for me. I thought he would somehow find me and save me from the ruins of our lost life. Then, after a while, I realized that Mike…
Sensory Math Replay
Mike is unable to post today, so we went back into our archives and found this gem that he wrote back in 2015. His words still hold true today, so enjoy this replay of his post… When Megan died, i went into full sensory deprivation mode. I could no longer see her face, hear her voice, taste her lips, smell her body wash, or touch her skin.
Sometimes the Scary Thing Brings the Most Support – Sharing
So I’ll finally share with you that when Clayton passed away I was terrified of the insecurity and my financial stability. I had no idea what to do and the thought of getting a third job (because grief is my second job) was overwhelming. At the time, my sister had started using essential oils and had just started sharing them with her friends and…
You Feel Far Away
It’s been almost 8 years since you died. I moved out of our apartment long ago. Then I moved again. And then again. Then I made a big move out of the NY area completely – leaving where we shared all of our years together. I have a totally different job than when you were alive. I’m going into real estate. I wrote about you. About us.We…
Loved Still, Loved Always ~ Flash Back
Alison wrote in today to say that she wouldn’t be able to write her blog, so we chose a piece that she shared in 2016 that we thought you would enjoy. <3 These days that stretch and wind and turn and curve Nights that do the same This life filled with unknowing and uncertainty And grief and loss and wandering and wondering Roads that stretch and…