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Emily Vielhauer

Joy and Melancholy

Posted on: April 17, 2023 | Posted by: Emily Vielhauer

Yesterday was my oldest son’s birthday. This Thursday will mark two years since Tony’s death. It is hard to hold both of those dates in my heart so close together. The date that we became parents for the first time with the date we all lost him. Joy and melancholy fold in on themselves. This […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed Parenting, Widowed Effect on Family/Friends, Widowed Memories, Widowed Birthdays, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Suddenly, Widowed by Suicide, Uncategorized

Missing My Bookend

Posted on: April 10, 2023 | Posted by: Emily Vielhauer

I am quickly approaching the two-year mark of Tony’s passing. In a way, I just want to get past the 20th of this month so I can put that date in my rearview window, versus watching for its head on approach. The grief is different now than it was in the beginning. I no longer […]

Categories: Uncategorized

Boundaries as a Superpower

Posted on: April 3, 2023 | Posted by: Emily Vielhauer

Setting boundaries might be my widow superpower. Okay, maybe not a superpower but it’s a skill I continue to learn to flex. By nature, I’m a people pleaser who hates confrontation. However, losing Tony and experiencing everything that comes along with that loss changes a person. I don’t have the time or the capacity to […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Belongings, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Community

Art Reflects Life

Posted on: March 27, 2023 | Posted by: Emily Vielhauer

It’s not surprising that things hit differently once we are widowed, but sometimes it’s still unexpected. In 2019, I excitedly ordered tickets to Hamilton when it was coming through on tour. Tony didn’t love the theatre like I did, but he put up with a show every now and then because he loved me. My […]

Categories: Widowed Effect on Family/Friends, Widowed Memories, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Community, Widowed Suddenly

Our Anniversary, Number 16 and Number 2

Posted on: March 20, 2023 | Posted by: Emily Vielhauer

  Friday would have been our 16th wedding anniversary and it’s the 2nd one he’s missed. The last two years I have intentionally been away from home on St. Patrick’s Day. Last year, the kids and I went to Florida to visit my parents. This year we spent a long weekend in the Ozarks with […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed Effect on Family/Friends, Widowed Memories, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Anniversaries, Widowed Holidays, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions

My Blogiversary

Posted on: March 13, 2023 | Posted by: Emily Vielhauer

This post marks my one-year anniversary as a writer for the Widow’s Voice. 52 weeks of sharing my journey with fellow widowed people and our support networks that follow this blog. There are weeks I start to write this and I’m not sure what direction it’ll go. Other times, I know exactly what has been […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed Parenting, Widowed Effect on Family/Friends, Widowed Memories, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Anniversaries, Widowed Emotions

Exercise as Self Care

Posted on: March 6, 2023 | Posted by: Emily Vielhauer

Why is it so hard to prioritize ourselves and our health? Before Tony passed, I had started a workout routine that I enjoyed. It was the first time since having kids that I had started one and was sticking to it. The day he passed was the 79th day in a row that I had […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed Parenting, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Therapy, Widowed by Suicide, Uncategorized

Reliving the Worst

Posted on: February 27, 2023 | Posted by: Emily Vielhauer

I try not to relive the trauma of the day our lives changed forever too often. The memories are seared into my brain and are always there to conjure if prompted. I do my best to let them lay because they are so painful to hold on the surface for too long. Yesterday, a friend […]

Categories: Widowed Parenting, Widowed Memories, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Suddenly, Widowed by Suicide

My Village

Posted on: February 20, 2023 | Posted by: Emily Vielhauer

Yesterday I flew home from a five-day trip to Florida without the kids. Looking back on it, I realize how fortunate I am to have a support system that allowed me to go. My in-laws signed on early to the idea of keeping the boys for the entirety of my trip. Normally when I leave […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed Parenting, Widowed Effect on Family/Friends, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Emotions, Widowed by Suicide, Uncategorized

Bittersweet Victory

Posted on: February 13, 2023 | Posted by: Emily Vielhauer

Yesterday was the biggest football game there is, and our Chiefs came out Champions. Growing up in Kansas City, the hometown love was instilled early. There is no other professional football team for me. I have swiped no to people on dating sites simply because they are wearing a Raiders jersey. There are some lines […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed Memories, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Signs from Loved One, Widowed by Suicide, Uncategorized

Recognized

Posted on: February 6, 2023 | Posted by: Emily Vielhauer

When something tragic happens, everyone seems to know about it. You expect your core and extended people to know your story. I often forget how far-reaching bad news can be. How, in the age of social media and the internet it doesn’t take long for news to spread. It spreads far beyond what we even […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed Effect on Family/Friends, Widowed Memories, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Emotions, Widowed by Suicide, Uncategorized

Cheering On Our Team

Posted on: January 30, 2023 | Posted by: Emily Vielhauer

Yesterday was a big day for my city. In two weeks, my beloved Chiefs are headed back to the biggest football game. Like the week before, I gathered with my neighborhood crew to watch the game. If you didn’t watch, the game was a nailbiter. In the end, our team pulled through and across town […]

Categories: Widowed, Widowed Effect on Family/Friends, Widowed Memories, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Suddenly

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