“Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.” –Melody Beattie Gratitude snuck up on me today. Gratitude is a wily beast! It captured me in a google search and surrounded me in its giant warm hug. It came to me through a poem from Melody […]
Widowed Community
One Chapter Closing, Another Opening
Many moons ago, I was a regular writer on the Widow’s Voice blog. In fact, in 2008, I was the only writer. My hope at the time was to offer a real, in-the-moment glimpse into widowed life as I was living it. After just a couple of weeks, it became clear that our community needed […]
Grief in Poetry
I was doing a little doom scrolling today and stumbled on a video that cut me to the quick. In the best and worst way, because that’s how grief works. The video was taken at the Happy Place Festival in the UK in August. It’s raining and a rainbow of streamers that decorate a tent […]
Season of Fall
Season of Dying “In Asian mysticism and Chinese medicine, Autumn is considered the season of Grief. While summer is associated with the emotion of joy, autumn is associated with both courage and sadness. If you are grieving, you can probably feel the truth of that association for yourself, because, in Autumn, things are dying.” — […]
What is a Bad*ss Widowed Person Anyway?
“Badass” (often stylized with an asterisk, like “bad*ss”) is an informal term referring to someone, typically a woman in recent contexts, who is tough, formidable, and indomitable, often in the face of adversity or to challenge norms. (AI Dictionary) What qualifies a widowed person as a bad*ss? A Bad*ss Widowed Person discerns when […]
Ready to Let Go of Tangible Reflections of their Love
Lynn was big on having (over the counter) meds on hand – allergy, flu, tummy ache, headache, etc. She had them organized in plastic bags that she carefully labeled with what they were for. I have struggled all these years with clutter cleaning, getting-rid-of, holding onto things until I am ready to let them go, […]
Widowhood Lessons
From a Labrador Retriever Awakened by my pet at 3:00am, I moan…. “Indy. . .” “Seriously?” A refrain I speak to my pet and my widowed life regularly. On par with life, her wee-hour pee evolves, occasionally, into something more complicated if a possum, racoon, or other nighttime critter makes an appearance. This […]
Dead People Everywhere
It’s easy to get caught up in our own losses and forget that death impacts everyone. You look around at the grocery store and think you are the only widow buying hamburgers you’ll probably burn again. At the Dr’s office, it’s easy to assume the rest of the dads are at work. On vacation, every […]
Making Lemonade
It’s been 2 weeks, and I have been a bad widow, off doing widow things with this widow brain of mine. Week 1 totally spaced the Monday blog duty. Week 2, forgot to email and ask for a repost since I was out of town. Bad widow brain. Right before school started, I took the […]
Looking back . . .
. . . it was all fear. “No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear.” –C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed An interesting phenomena when looking back to the early days of widowhood is that I see things now that I was unable to see then. Things I may or may not […]
How far have I come?
Where am I headed? The word journey is a funny word. It seems to speak of both time and distance. How far does one travel on the path of grief? Where exactly are we “going”? From 2021 to the present, my journey loosely followed this trajectory: –Year One was a fog; I went […]
A Love Letter to Widowed People
in Riverside and Beyond Michele Neff Hernandez, SSI, and Marlene Huerta Frazer, Widow Goals, Inland Empire Do you ever have a “plan” that’s perfect and then you find that LIFE has it’s own plan? I sure do. When volunteering to host a screening for Camp Widow, I had a vision in my mind that […]