Years go by. Days, months, life events. Before you know it, you have been living with the death of your person for almost 13 years. It goes by in a flash, and also, excruciatingly slow. Life goes on, as they say. But sometimes what really sucks is that the constant death of your person also […]
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Rich’s Play List and a Lyrical Birthday Tribute
Tomorrow, February 4th, is Rich’s birthday. He was a music-loving Jersey Guy and just after his passing, I’d say “play me a song, Rich” when I’d start out on the road and turned on the radio. Soon there was a pattern, a constellation of songs, that would inevetibly come on over the airways and sometimes […]
Embracing the Abyss of Grief
The day before my birthday in 2021, I wrote this original piece below over on my Medium account (modified slightly for this post). Since we’re rapidly coming up upon the anniversary of Mario’s expiry date, I revisited it. I definitely feel like I’m in a different place now 3 years hence, but I also feel […]
Feeling Dread
Lee’s brother and her mom used to regale me with stories of her harrowing first year of life, when, for a time it appears, she hovered above the razor’s edge between life and death. Happily, for all concerned, Lee not only survived but thrived. One time Lee and I were discussing our respective childhood illnesses, […]
What is Intentional Community?
Traveling the Path Together [COMMUNITY: Part 3] I experienced intentional community for the first time in 1979. It changed my life. “Some come to talk, others come to listen,” the leader said. “Most do a bit of both. Engage here in whatever way feels comfortable for you. We’re glad you’re here.” […]
Flight Down Memory Lane
Sometimes I don’t actively realize how hard it would be to re-visit a place that I’ve been with Erik. And we have been to so many places so how can I possibly avoid all of them? I can’t. This past weekend I flew to Hawaii for my best friend’s birthday trip. The last time I […]
Car Troubles
Here’s a new one for me, I cried dropping my car off for a repair. I had it all worked out. After I dropped off my car, I would order an Uber to take me to my parents to pick up a spare vehicle. I handed over my keys and realized there was no waiting […]
Losing Time
As some of you who follow me here may know, since I have posted about it recently, my dad was diagnosed with dementia with Alzheimers Disease. His confusion, cognitive skills issues, and memory loss have been going on for awhile now, and we have been worried. He finally agreed to get some testing done, and […]
Stopping to Refuel
I’ve enjoyed the bit of cold temperatures that we “endured” for a few weeks in Central Florida. Cold is relative state. While my friends and family in the north deal with temps in the 30s, a “cold” day here is in the low 50s, with 30s in the evening, but that’s fleeting. But here we […]
“All of the Moments You Take for Granted”
Trigger warnings for death by illness and mention of suicide. I’ve recently been watching video blogs posted by Jackson Galaxy on Youtube – a guy known as the “cat daddy” who originally came to fame through being a cat behaviorist who got his own tv show, “My Cat From Hell”. The videos are documenting the […]
Z and Me
Z was the first person I met at the new high school where, as a senior, I was enrolled after my folks relocated from the city to the suburbs. This wasn’t an easy transition for me as it meant leaving behind longtime classmates and friends to start over at a place where I had no […]
Common Feelings and Attitudes
Along the Path of Grief [COMMUNITY: Part 2] The role of feelings in grief is huge. Feelings impact us when they are present, absent, strong, subtle, frozen, overwhelming, invisible, or constantly changing. The famous writer, C.S.Lewis, describes the changing nature of feelings through his own experience. “No one ever told me that grief […]