Filling in for Jackie today with a post I wrote almost four years ago. Even today, I can clearly remember the feeling of wanting to be dead. It would have been terrifying if I were capable of feeling anything besides empty, but in that moment all I wanted was to be with Phil. Of all the words I have written over the past 5.8 months the ones I share…
Blog
not me.
after all that’sbeen happeningthe last week, i’m pretty sickof talking about myself, so here’s lifeas viewed throughsomeone else’s eyes.(i’m pretty proud of her).
“It Can’t Take Away What You’ve Lost ….
Jim and me …. at the huge surprise party he managed to truly pull off, for my 40th. … but it is something.” The above title and sentence was a line from last night’s episode of “E.R.”.* It stopped me …… I literally stopped and stared at the screen. And no, it wasn’t because it was George Clooney who said it. He was playing his…
Home Destruction
On my way to my morning breakfast taco place, I had to dodge a large truck in the road carrying a huge backhoe. Oh brother, I thought. They are going to tear something up. That’s going to be an inconvenience for someone. And I didn’t pay another thought to it, at least until I drove by on my way back home just thirty minutes later. The beast…
Ranting & Raving. But Not Mad.
I sat earlier in the week in my parent’s living room. I watched as my mother struggled to move about the house with her walker. I watched as my father tried to anticipate her every move. I saw how carefully he has to think about where she will sit, and will she feel comfortable there. I sat as she talked about her pain. I sat as her thoughts became…
730 Days
Written on April 15, 2011 729 days and 22 hours ago… we were dancing in his room. We were drinking beer, watching American Idol and eating. I can’t remember what. We were laughing together, his sister, his best childhood friend, my friend and I. And then one of us would look at him, and cry. I tried to forget all of…
How Did You Two Meet?
Recently I spent eight days with one of my favorite people in the world. You all know her as our Tuesday blogger, I call her tacalla. You’ve heard one or the other of us use that term here on the blog (tacalla is the Spanish word for two things that share the same name), as a way of explaining our shared Michel/lleness. Just imagine for a minute…
i’m a jerk…a widowed jerk
I am strong. I am brave. I am a survivor. I am usually empathetic and kind. But…… Sometimes I’m an angry whiner. I wallow in my self-pity and the life that I now exist in. I realize that life is a gift and that we must be grateful for the amount of time we spend with our loved ones and upon this Earth…..But there are times I can’t help…
for madeline.
on saturday some of the most important people in our lives will be with us as we celebrate maddy’s third birthday. again. (yeah, maddy’s birthday sort of runs from her actual birthdate of march 24th to her estimated due date of mid may). she and her friends will be beating a piñata, eating cupcakes, and throwing things around our backyard…
Even Deeper ….
…. purging.Last week I told you that I was purging my home and attic and getting things organized.What I didn’t tell you …. was how deeply I was purging.You can see that there’s a lot of “stuff” in my garage, but you most likely can’t make anything out (due to my fabulous skills as a photographer).But there’s something there …. on the right…
Through the Pensieve
I’m fresh back from a wonderful week of vacation (thanks Chris for guest blogging last week – great post!!). I went on a cruise and visited three tropical islands. By odd coincidence, the stop in St. Thomas fell on Daniel’s 41st birthday. This coincidence is only odd because St. Thomas was one of his favorite places, and I’d never been there. We’d…
Yellow Roses
The day this posts, April 11th, is my daughter’s 20th birthday. No longer a teenager. Maybe not quite a full adult, but a day to let her know how much I love her, and how I wish for only good things in her future. Rather than buy her some new gadget, I decided to spend a little extra, and let her know what I truly thought of her. She is my diamond.