And so begins another year. Another year of accepting a reality that looked so different than what I thought life would be. This year seemed to have started off so hectic. From another holiday season where it just felt like I was running on fumes trying to keep up with the world, yet still trying […]
Widowed Holidays
For Us, An Uneventful New Year
Robyn had set her alarm. She wanted to see a local television countdown to the New Year but dozed right through it. Each year her favorite weather gal and handsome on-air partner perform a music and dance routine, followed by a slew of “media personalities” and minor performers. The program was about the last I […]
Another New Year, Another Chapter Without You
As I sit here on New Year’s Eve reflecting on my day compared to all those past New Year’s Eves I can’t help but daydream about what we would be doing if you were still here today. Thinking about all our past memories and all those memories yet to be made that you will continue […]
Midnight Kisses
Emily is off for the holidays. Please enjoy this repost of “Midnight Kisses”. Last week the kids and I were on our annual holiday vacation. Since Tony’s death, I have taken the kids to Disney World, Beaches Jamaica, and now Xcaret Mexico over the holiday break. There are a variety of reasons vacationing this time […]
My Spirit Team Six
I hope you all got through the Christmas holiday alright. I know this time of year can be especially difficult for many, whether your loss occured last week, or several years ago. The shadow of that loss can dim even the brightest of holiday lights. On Christmas Eve morning, I spent some time on the […]
A Happy Holiday
The gray, overcast, and snow-less Christmas morning had left me listless, especially after two or three virtually identical days preceding it. The gray seemed to get to Lola the Pup, who lolled nearby on the day bed watching me as I half-heartedly worked my arms and shoulders with the thick exercise bands. Mont invited me […]
Forgetting on Christmas
Bullet Points . . . My apologies for nearly missing my post this week. Here are my bullet points about how I find myself in the predicament of forgetting to show up on Widow’s Voice this week: Bullet points keep me ahead of sleep who stalks me. It is 10:42 pm PDT and I just […]
‘Tis the Tangled Lights
A repost – Merry Christmas Eve! And there goes the second December without Erik. This past week has been a whirlwind of emotions. December is always such a hard time. The holiday season starts with our wedding anniversary on the eve of Christmas Eve. This second year of celebrating the holidays without Erik hit me […]
Christmas Superheroes
Today is Christmas Eve Eve. As a solo parent, who is prone to overprogramming there is so much to do with so little time. I found myself trying to do it all today. I wrapped up work for the holidays, grabbed last minute stocking candy, cleaned the house, cooked dinner, packed the kids for Christmas, […]
An Eye on Two Worlds
Brings a Bit of Healing Magic There’s nothing like a Christmas movie to bring the magic of the season to the present moment. Tonight I watched The Christmas Chronicles on Netflix which brought alive memories of the Spirit of Christmas from childhood—an enchantment! I recall just a few of my childhood presents…my Toodles doll is […]
Even Santa Can’t Do This
It has been a whirlwind of a season. When the holidays came around this year I told myself I would focus more on being present for the twins than worrying about to-do lists. I told myself I would focus on letting myself feel the grief I needed to during this time rather than pushing it […]
House Hold
This week began with a visit from long-time friends from New Jersey that still live on the same road as Rich and I had at the New Jersey Shore. They were visiting other NJ refugees that now reside along the coast about an hour from here and spent the day learning about rural Central […]