I am not going to lie, this one is a tough one for me to write, like I really had to think about it long and hard. Before the massive earthquake that decimated my life, AKA the death of my husband, I was the eternal optimist, the happy-go-lucky (most times 😆), borderline toxically positive person, […]
Widowed Emotions
It Is What It Is
To honor the strength it takes to face what we did not choose—and to recognize the quiet courage within ourselves and others that rises up to meet it. Oprah Daily Intention, April 4, 2026 I survived ‘the visit’ just fine (reference last week’s post). As usual, my thoughts and fears beforehand were far […]
A Dating Methodology
Over the last few years, I’ve dated on and off. I’ve primarily used dating apps because I don’t find myself ‘in the wild’ where there are other single people. Dating as a widow, after a marriage I was happy in has been a challenge. While I can feel broken and discombobulated, I also know what […]
Once Upon a Time…👑
…In a Far, Far Away Kingdom 👸🏻 In the kingdom of a city in the USA, there lived a beautiful, brave, brave princess. She had just entered teenagehood, and she lived with her loving parents, the King and Queen, her older brother, the Prince, and the royal pet, June, the collie-lab mix. They lived a […]
Awaiting the Unknown
So they’re coming this afternoon … I’ve boxed up all of the things for them to take away. Lots of photos that I know they want and a lot of other things I hope they will want. I read a few more of those letters Jim wrote to Estelle from Vietnam and they are just so […]
Mother’s Day with Boys
Another Mother’s Day has come and gone; six to be exact since Tony died. It is still weird to wake up on a day like Mother’s Day without him. I always take myself back in time to the last one he was alive for. He and the boys picked up the house, emptied the dishwasher, […]
What do Cinco de Mayo 🇲🇽 and Mother’s Day 💐 have in common?
Nothing, except everything. Yesterday, May 5th, the grief hit me out of nowhere, yet not entirely unexpectedly. We loved turning nothing into something, any excuse into a celebration. Take Cinco de Mayo, for instance. Not Mexican Independence Day 🇲🇽 and not a widely celebrated holiday in Mexico, but after nearly 30 years […]
Ya gotta feel all the feelings
… and I’ve sure been doing a lot of ‘feeling’ lately. Feeling Jim’s absence here in our home as the days, weeks, months pass. Feeling my age … in my brain and in my body. I just don’t have the energy to “people” – to put on that happy face for others. I have a […]
A Hole in the House
What in the widowed life is going on here? I have a literal hole in my house. This is a prime example of a situation where I would have had to exert zero thoughts on the matter if Tony was alive. Instead, I am very overwhelmed. Last week, my oldest came home from school and […]
The Wild Wild Southwest 🌵
First things first, and the most important thing first: this airline gets me!!! ➡️➡️➡️➡️➡️➡️ But seriously, the polarity of this journey that goes from one end of the emotional spectrum to the other in a nanosecond, I had to take a picture of it. Well, we did it! We survived and, may I dare say, […]
DeathFest V in Review
A week ago, I hosted a party called DeathFest V (5) to honor the life Tony lived and the person he was. Tony loved revelry with all the people he loved. Even though the party had a dark name, gathering together was at the center of the event. As I built the invite list, I […]
Memorials & Keepsakes
In the U.S., cremation seems to be the preferred method of disposing of remains with 63.4% compared to a burial rate of 31.6%. Pretty sure this has greatly changed over the decades as even when I was a kid I don’t think anyone I knew of who passed away was cremated. The funeral was always […]