Before Don’s sudden death on that ordinary Wednesday back in July of 2011, I am not sure if I believed in signs or energy or souls or whatever you want to call it. Even now, all these years later and after the countless times Ive felt him close or felt an obvious Don-vibe happening, I […]
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The “Write Tools” for Processing Grief
When I submitted my request to present at Camp Widow in Tampa and/or San Diego to Soaring Spirits International, I had a fairly good grasp of what I wanted to achieve with my presentation. When my proposal was accepted, however, I began to worry if what I had in mind would be beneficial to those […]
Outlets for our Grief
There are so many ways that I cope and deal with my grief, and it has evolved over time, and I have needed different things as other life stressors and changes have happened. I was already in therapy when Boris died, and I increased the number of times I was going, plus added an additional […]
Lola Turns Three
Lee died during the height of the pandemic, which the philosopher, Jonathan Lear, refers to as “the year of isolation,” long months before a vaccine was developed. (See https://news.uchicago.edu/why-mourning-essential-our-well-being-jonathan-lear.) It was a time of unprecedented uncertainty about our future. Everyone felt it. Not coincidentally, the pandemic also created unprecedented demand for animal companions. Suddenly breeders […]
Butterfly Fly Away
Last week I attended what I thought was my first funeral since Erik’s funeral. As I was driving up this cemetery hill something looked all too familiar. Then the flashback came. My cousin and I had driven up a similar hill for another funeral just a little over a month after Erik’s passing. I couldn’t […]
Its a Beautiful Morning
Hello Lovely Readers. Happy Sunday to you all. Every now and again, at 12 years post-loss, there is a day or two where things are just really nice. Sometimes it can even be a small moment, and sometimes it can be an entire day or maybe even two. And when those days happen, the love […]
In a Pickle
I was always a decent athlete, who loved to compete. As a kid, each Summer my folks would send me to a sports camp, which exposed me to a wide array of team and individual sports. And I was fortunate to get instruction from college level coaches. This instruction, together with the extra work I […]
Last Parent Standing
I am not a single parent. I am a solo parent. It was only a few months after Erik’s passing that I was out of town. Everything during this time was still painful. Waking up, breathing, pretending to smile, existing – it was all so painful. I was on my way to the airport to […]
Camping Without Him
This weekend the kids and I embarked on another first without Tony. Two years and three months after his passing I accepted an invitation to go on a camping float trip. Tony loved the outdoors and for him all the prep work to camp was worth the effort. I went along for the ride because […]
Widowed People Dancing
So last Sunday, once again I forgot to write my blog post in here. My apologies. Again. But I have a pretty good excuse this time, I think. Well, a better excuse than most of the other times when I just forget because Im scatter-brained and have widow brain and grief fog, even 12 years […]
Post Camp Coping
Today I just want to take a moment to acknowledge my Dad’s First Heavenly Birthday. He passed on April 29th and I shared his Service and legacy in a previous post. Quint was one of his biggest fans. He is truly missed by so many, especially my mom who finds herself widowed in her mid-90s. […]
Relentless Cancer
In case you might ever wonder, I do read my fellow writers’ weekly contributions to this site. My own tale is quite sad for me, of course, but not particularly dramatic. Simply, once Lee developed pancreatic cancer, her outcome was never much in doubt. As happens to millions of others each year, I lost my […]