Content Warning: Child loss I cannot write about my life today. A sweet 11-year-old little girl who attends the same elementary school as my kids, died from cancer this morning. I feel a melancholy settling over me as I process this news. I am not close with the family though we know […]
Widowed Suddenly
The Little Things
I miss the little things. The things not many people talk about in loss. I don’t just miss my person on holidays, anniversaries, or milestones, but all those in between days. All the in-between minutes and seconds and moments. Something as simple as how he used to hug me from behind as I made dinner. […]
Another New Year
This past weekend our family celebrated Lunar New Year, as we do every year, but our second without Erik. For the first time since his passing, I wasn’t truly dreading a holiday. It was one of Erik’s favorite holidays since he met me and this year leading up to it I felt hopeful. I wasn’t […]
Dreaming of Him
Even after almost three years, I rarely dream of Tony. I would venture to guess I’ve had no more than ten dreams of him since he passed. In the beginning, I remember falling asleep hopeful he’d make an appearance. Knowing I’d never again see him in the physical world had me craving a visit of […]
The Mosson Love Story
A repost! As my birthday approaches next week so does the day that I met Erik. I met him the day after my 21st birthday. I always told him getting to meet him was my late, but amazing life-changing birthday gift. Although, I did think my birthday was on the 28th of August for 13 […]
Flight Down Memory Lane
Sometimes I don’t actively realize how hard it would be to re-visit a place that I’ve been with Erik. And we have been to so many places so how can I possibly avoid all of them? I can’t. This past weekend I flew to Hawaii for my best friend’s birthday trip. The last time I […]
Car Troubles
Here’s a new one for me, I cried dropping my car off for a repair. I had it all worked out. After I dropped off my car, I would order an Uber to take me to my parents to pick up a spare vehicle. I handed over my keys and realized there was no waiting […]
Managing the Storm
Ever since Erik’s passing I’ve had a hard time finding something just for myself. Something that would take my mind off grieving just for a little bit, but also something I could look forward to that wasn’t just obligations of daily life. Around the 6 month mark, people started telling me, “You need to start […]
Butterfly Fly Away
A repost! Last week I attended what I thought was my first funeral since Erik’s funeral. As I was driving up this cemetery hill something looked all too familiar. Then the flashback came. My cousin and I had driven up a similar hill for another funeral just a little over a month after Erik’s passing. […]
One Thousand Days
Today marks 1,000 days since Tony died. 999 days I’ve woken up as a widow. I have a countdown app on my phone. The kind most people use to enter fun things, like upcoming vacations or special events. I do use it for those things, but awhile back I also discovered that it would count […]
A Heavy Heart
As I looked at the date today I couldn’t believe that it was only the second Tuesday of 2024. We are barely one week into this new year and it seems as if so much has happened. Within the past two days, I have had two friends pass back to back. Then to hear from […]
Another Year
Whew. And just like that the season is wrapped up. Finally. Since the ‘ber months started all I could think to myself was, just get me to January 2nd. As hard as it is every day to live with grief it’s worst during the holiday season. Mostly when our wedding anniversary falls two days before […]