There are literally 45 minutes remaining in Christmas Day 2025 as I begin to write this post. Having just spent time on a variety of sites for the widowed on Social Media, many commenters were counting down the minutes and hours for the day to be over. Many more relayed how they’d dreaded the days […]
Widowed Holidays
A Quiet Christmas
When I was growing up, we never had huge family gatherings for holidays. I can remember maybe a handful of Christmas days where my grandparents on my dad’s side stopped by for like an hour (and they only lived like 15 minutes away). I think a couple times my uncle, also on my dad’s side, […]
A Brief Family Reunion
This week, I am hosting Cousin Judy, who settled in California (by way of Montreal) many, many years ago, after moving away from here as a young married person. She and her husband had two children. Judy has been a widow for at least the past fifteen years. One day, she came home from work […]
Approaching Year’s End
Closing Down 2025 Tomorrow is Christmas Eve. My feeling? Pretty chill, actually. I’m saving my present wrapping for tomorrow after church. We draw names, so only one special person’s presents require wrap. No party happening here, so no busy prep. I plan to sit by my brightly lit tree to wrap my gifts and then […]
My First Christmas …
… without Jim. And there won’t be any decorations or a tree or any cards and gifts sent. I just can’t do any of that this year. It’s hard to get into the holiday spirit when you’re missing your husband. The Christmas tree is such a big undertaking, full of memories, and the other things […]
Visiting Cemeteries
I am currently in the Philippines, visiting with family for the holidays. We are from a small mountain town, where both my parents’ families have lived for generations. My Mom, who passed away 2.5 years ago, is here in our family mausoleum. Even when I was a child visiting “home,” going to the cemetery was […]
It is Truly Better to Give
Around this time each year, I make numerous charitable contributions to causes that were near and dear to Lee’s kind heart. It’s a way for me to honor her that makes me feel like we are still sharing. *** For example, even before Lola the pup came into my life, Lee and I were stalwarts […]
Holiday Pause for Peace
What do I need in this moment? I take a breath I breathe in peace I breathe in silence I breathe in words, story, and music https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lCpXMy5GalI&list=RDlCpXMy5GalI&start_radio=1 Please excuse the holiday ad at the beginning. Worth waiting for Peace on Earth with Bing Crosby & David Bowie and assorted music […]
Holiday Traditions Evolving
“Fun” fact – Lynn and I never spent a Christmas together in the 10 years we were together on Earth. Her family lived in Tennessee, and mine lived in the same town we lived. We both had big families we were close to, with lots of nieces and nephews. We both wanted to spend the […]
On the Scent of Home
Four years ago December 9th, I adopted an adorable Maltese-mix puppy out in San Diego. I’ve written before about Quint’s arrival in my life just seven weeks after Rich’s passing. Quint, named for Robert Shaw’s character in JAWS, began his life on the very same day Rich entered the ICU beginning what would become the […]
Winter Arrives Early
After I had bragged here about months of unseasonably nice weather at home, Robyn and I just returned from a glorious week on a beach in the Dominican Republic to find eight inches of snow on the ground with temperatures hovering in the low twenties. Snow and the trailing bitter cold constituted a one-two punch. […]
Bringing Our Person Into the Holidays
Traditions, Rituals, and Memory Making Where do we begin? How does one start a new tradition or ritual for one’s self or for a family? How does making memories help? As holidays appear and then move on, how do we fill the empty place where our person is missing? GRIEF I had my own […]