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It is Truly Better to Give

Posted on: December 18, 2025 | Posted by: Gary Ravitz

Around this time each year, I make numerous charitable contributions to causes that were near and dear to Lee’s kind heart. It’s a way for me to honor her that makes me feel like we are still sharing.

***

For example, even before Lola the pup came into my life, Lee and I were stalwarts of organizations that exist to aid animals, especially dogs, cats, and birds.  For many years, we made sure the wintering birds on our city property had food. We also installed an electric birdbath on our back porch. No matter how cold or snowy it got outdoors, our birds always had fresh water for bathing.

The sight of six or seven tiny sparrows squeezed together and splashing away in the bath was as charming as anything that Woodstock of Charlie Browen fame ever managed. And our Deer Tick Manor getaway, being heavily wooded and fortuitously situated on a major migratory route, was blessed by a large assortment of wild birds of all sizes, colors, and songs.

***

Lee introduced me to an international charity that helps people to become self-sufficient, in part, by providing them with domesticated animals, seeds, and farm implements, thereby allowing them to raise and sell their own food. We also donated to domestic organizations that provide food and medical services to those in need.

Lee’s charitable instincts were heartfelt and real.  I used to kid her that she was a pushover for anyone she encountered on the street holding a squeegee.

***

Meanwhile, I have long favored my own pet charities, including those that promote nature, science, and civic activities. The fact that I have reached the age when I am subject to a new tax based on my IRA, known as a required minimum distribution (RMD), means that I potentially will have even more money available for charitable donations.

 

I already made sizeable donations to my local food bank and a scholarship fund for budding designers. By far, however, the largest single contribution to date is my charitable gift to the Pancreatic Cancer Network in Lee’s honor. The other day I received a call from one of its directors, thanking me, which made me cry for Lee. I told this person I would be grateful if her organization could extend the life of even one person afflicted by this horrible disease.  Before the year concludes, I still have other donations to make.

 

From year to year, these charities remain the same, but the amounts of my donations might change depending on prevailing circumstances. For example, on the heels of the recently ended government shutdown, I have increased my donations to public television and my favorite classical music radio station.  Unfortunately, their budgets were deeply slashed or eliminated.

***

Whether it is large or small, please consider making a charitable donation to honor your deceased.  If you don’t have the money, then consider doing something on a volunteer basis that you think he (or she) would appreciate. Better still, do both.

Categories: Widowed Holidays

About Gary Ravitz

In relevant part, my musings are for me. It’s one of the ways in which I process losing my sweetest. Of course, Lee didn’t want to die. She had fought like hell, but the relentless cancers kept coming: Skin cancers; breast cancer; head and neck cancer; colon cancer; and finally, the deadly pancreatic cancer. In June 2020, and only after being pressed hard by Lee, her oncologist opined that my wife had from two weeks to two months left to live, turned on her heels and nearly sprinted from the hospital room, never again to be seen or heard from by us. I promptly removed Lee from the hospital and brought her home. It was the right thing to do and I only wish I had acted sooner over “the best” medical advice to the contrary. In fact, my sweet wife only had nine days left to live. At the final, she embraced her own death with great courage and unfailing kindness. It was a truly remarkable display of grace and wondrous to behold. It was my great privilege and honor to be with her every step of the way. And now, it’s my privilege to be able to write a few words to you each week. In a nutshell, I believe every journey is unique, but, hopefully, to know that you do not have to walk it alone can also be reassuring. And, along the way, you might hear a bit more information about me.
Gary

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