Two Thanksgiving celebrations down, and one to go. It’s been an interesting couple of days. Friday night I hosted an office Thanksgiving potluck at my home. Almost every person from the office came, along with their families. There was so much food, wine and desert, and everyone was in a very good mood. Most had hoped to meet Abel, and since he had…
Widowed
Deny
When loss strikes, we have a way of denying ourselves of things. Whether it be the ability to smile since they can’t smile. The ability to see all the impact that they’re life left by focusing on the fact that they were taken so suddenly. The ability to celebrate life’s happenings, since they are not there to celebrate it with you. Our ability to…
Hope and Rope
After a week of being less social that usual, last Friday night sucked. Really, really sucked. I have no idea what triggered the mess. I wasn’t wallowing around in old wedding pictures. I hadn’t gone back in time to read our Great Cancer Adventure blog (reading about our last days together still transforms me into a wailing mess of a man.) But…
a better widow than me
Last night, I finally threw Jeff’s toothbrush in the trash. 3 years, 7 months and 22 days, since he used it to scrub his teeth clean. This action was precipitated a few days ago when I had spoken to a dear friend who is known for being outspoken and blunt. She doesn’t mean harm at all but is very Northern European in the delivery of her very strong…
Saints vs. ….
…. Sinners. That’s what we tend to sometimes make our dead spouse ….. a saint. It’s a good thing they’re dead. No one could actually live up to those standards. Jim was not a saint. Not by a long shot. But then, neither was/am I. But …… and this is a pretty large “but”….. …… we had almost 27 years to work on our relationship.And we…
I am not alone (why I am glad I blog)
I’m sitting here, calmly typing this and it’s been 622 days since my husband died. I know exactly how many days because of my regular blog. But to think that I can type this without tears would have been unthinkable a year ago. I began writing about my pain just over a month after the accident. I blogged everything because I knew I’d always be able…
The Fraudulent Widow
I have a confession to make. And to many of you it will sound preposterous. No doubt many of you will think that I am out of touch, delusional or didn’t have a “good” marriage. Some of you won’t believe me or won’t want to believe me. I am not of the widow crowd that believes that my husband, Art, was “my one and only love in my…
Sunday
So this is the first occasion of my newly assigned day. Sunday. A day of sun, as I see it, is a true blessing. For so many of us, worry, hardship, and the basic toll of life, can really bring us down. When the weekend is upon us, we tend to wonder how much we can get accomplished on Saturday, and how we want to spend a day of leisure on Sunday.
i dream of you
I’ve had many dreams of Jeff since his death. There are a few that are terrifying renditions of the last few minutes of his life; but the vast majority centre on seeing him again in a variety of surprising locations. I’ve found him on dairy farms slogging through the mud. I have glimpsed him on boats passing bridges that I stand upon. I have found…
A Note from Our Editor
Thank you all for your comments, suggestions, and kind remarks regarding last week’s posts. What I find equal parts amazing and challenging about leading this blog effort is attempting to meet the multitude of needs of our readers; allowing for the variety of opinions expressed regularly; and at the same time working to offer something valuable at…
Today
Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. -Lao Tzu It’s Veteran’s Day, and it comes every year with many people asking what I’ll be doing. How I’ll be honoring a day that my husband fought and died to be recognized as a part of.I guess in a way these days (Veteran’s and Memorial Day) are not so…
“Kevin”
Kevin was a fictional character on the award-winning Australian television series “Sea Change”. Kevin ran the local caravan park and on the surface, he appeared to be a fairly one-dimensional character – a gullible, but honest single-father doing the best he could on minimum wage and abilities. ….. but doing it with an air of a man who…