Robyn arrived on Super Bowl Sunday, fresh off visiting her son, her brother, and one of the grandkids in southern California. Robyn was greeted by a small earthquake upon her arrival there, but I would like to think that the Tucson leg of her trip, featuring me and Lola the pup, along with many fun […]
Uncategorized
A Cloudy Interlude
Yesterday started grey and stayed that way. Angry clouds enveloped the high peaks of the Catalina range like thick smoke, making daytime darker than it ought to be. I waited for a rainstorm that never materialized. The cool morning breeze that typically favors Tucson originates somewhere southeast of town, but by afternoon it has shifted […]
The Volume Button
Years go by. Days, months, life events. Before you know it, you have been living with the death of your person for almost 13 years. It goes by in a flash, and also, excruciatingly slow. Life goes on, as they say. But sometimes what really sucks is that the constant death of your person also […]
Flight Down Memory Lane
Sometimes I don’t actively realize how hard it would be to re-visit a place that I’ve been with Erik. And we have been to so many places so how can I possibly avoid all of them? I can’t. This past weekend I flew to Hawaii for my best friend’s birthday trip. The last time I […]
Losing Time
As some of you who follow me here may know, since I have posted about it recently, my dad was diagnosed with dementia with Alzheimers Disease. His confusion, cognitive skills issues, and memory loss have been going on for awhile now, and we have been worried. He finally agreed to get some testing done, and […]
Stopping to Refuel
I’ve enjoyed the bit of cold temperatures that we “endured” for a few weeks in Central Florida. Cold is relative state. While my friends and family in the north deal with temps in the 30s, a “cold” day here is in the low 50s, with 30s in the evening, but that’s fleeting. But here we […]
Z and Me
Z was the first person I met at the new high school where, as a senior, I was enrolled after my folks relocated from the city to the suburbs. This wasn’t an easy transition for me as it meant leaving behind longtime classmates and friends to start over at a place where I had no […]
Managing the Storm
Ever since Erik’s passing I’ve had a hard time finding something just for myself. Something that would take my mind off grieving just for a little bit, but also something I could look forward to that wasn’t just obligations of daily life. Around the 6 month mark, people started telling me, “You need to start […]
The Duality of Living
It is hard work, but it’s so important to find duality in our widowed lives. Sadness and Happiness. Grief and Joy. Heartache and Love. Sorrow and Wonder. I remember getting a piece of advice right after Tony died that came via another widow. That advice was to cry when you need to but don’t let […]
Just Peace, Please
Who else has been on this path – this grief tsunami – for a whole bunch of years now, like me? Who else has been living in the AFTERMATH of loss for some time, and has felt a significant change in what things are important to them, now, today, in this life? Who else has […]
On the Road Redux
Lola the pup and I are en route to our winter quarters. It was frigid the morning we left home. Fortunately, the cold that followed us seems to be dissipating here in Oklahoma City. I apologize that I don’t have a fresh piece for this week. However, I assure you that the one I published […]
One Thousand Days
Today marks 1,000 days since Tony died. 999 days I’ve woken up as a widow. I have a countdown app on my phone. The kind most people use to enter fun things, like upcoming vacations or special events. I do use it for those things, but awhile back I also discovered that it would count […]