Since Drew was a helicopter pilot, helicopters and anything to do with flying are always the biggest signs I get from him. I even found a tiny toy helicopter in this shack on the island of Barbados last spring while vacationing there with his family. It had washed up on the beach and the guy collected it to sell in his shop. No joke!And just a few…
Miscellaneous
Lost
I was having a farewell dinner this evening with a friend…which usually equates to sharing our thoughts on life and all that it teaches/has taught us thus far.At one point during our conversation, he looked at me and said, “Taryn, there was a quote from a book that changed my life. I want to share it and I want you to absorb it.”Intense!That was…
Questions?
Where is…?Who put that there…?When…?Why is……the bottle of brown sauce in the crockery cupboard?Did I put it there… or did John? I don’t remember doing that… but I don’t remember seeing John in the kitchen while I was cooking dinner, either. It must have been me that put the sauce in there, but have no recollection what so ever…
Dark and Hidden
I am honest on this blog in that I don’t lie about anything I write. Ever. But I don’t shareabout everything here. I don’t talk about the problems in my marriage with Dave and I don’t talk much about my dating life now. There are some things I just don’t want to write about here. But what would it be like if we all had a moment or a day or a week…
O
I recently came across this quote and found it spot on! Even nearly 7 years later, I find others questioning my choices (new and old) on how I have not only survived Micheal’s death, but chosen to thrive, grow and live afterwards. It made me realize that although Clementine hit the mark, she forgot a necessary factor. She forgot to add something…
Breaking
I’ve been traveling a ton the past week and in the midst of that, found myself looking through notebooks filled with quotes and thoughts that have inspired my being.One in particular, stuck out this evening:”Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.”Whoa!If that isn’t poignant to the ebbs and flows of our lives as…
Talking to the Echo
There is a space where my husband’s voice once lived, a big empty hole that sits in the center of my hours, my days, my years. It mocks me by following me wherever I go, And it feeds off of it’s own nothingness, Sipping on the hollow void, A cruel silence where there used to be sound.It follows me everywhere, But it is most cruel whenever I try…
Feel
Though I love to come here to share my thoughts, experiences and words, there are moments that I come across things that speak so poignantly that it must be given the space to spread to those who deserve to hear it. This letter is one I found this evening that I know so many who have lost, struggled, hurt and suffered, should read. Written by a…
Dreams
I never dream of him. I can’t for the life of me figure out why or how the person I spent most moments of 15 years with, the person I was closest to in my entire life, doesn’t show up in my dreams now that he’s gone from this earth. Or if he is, why I don’t remember those dreams but I do remember the mundane, annoying, or ridiculous dreams instead.
In Between
JERRY: You rented ‘Home Alone?’ GEORGE: Yeah. Do you mind if I watch it here? JERRY: What for? GEORGE: Because if I watch it at my apartment, I feel like Im not DOING anything. If I watch it here, Im out of the house. Im DOING something. – Seinfeld Today is a nothing day. Nothing important. Well, today is Halloween. By the time you read this,…
Load
It was one day after the one year mark of losing him. I was on a plane to Spain. One backpack in tow. Two sets of clothes. Euros. Some photos. My feet. 225 miles to hike on unknown terrain that had no map, but seashells in the ground as markers or random arrows painted on tree trunks. But before that flight and the pilgrimage, came the…
Drifting Back to NYC
…… and the relief I felt as soon as I sat down in my seat on the plane yesterday morning was amazing. It was like I had been carrying 500 pounds on my shoulders (causing a lot of pain in my neck!). As soon as I dropped into that seat, all of that weight lifted. In fact, I was so relaxed that I slept through most of the flight …… which…