I have The Ring. The one that binds all rings together. I’ve been looking at it lately Playing with it. Putting it on my left hand, where there has been no ring for over a year And it feels…not right anymore. It feels wrong on my left finger because it doesn’t feel like… me.The Ring. The one that binds all rings together. I had Art’s…
Widowed Memories
It Holds On
I’ve been getting everything ready for our upcoming AWP event these past two weeks. One of the neatest components to the time is the golf tournament. I know…golf….not synonymous with anything too exciting, but at each hole is a sign. A sign that bears words from a fallen hero’s wife. Words on his life, his character, his soul….even his…
for madeline.
on saturday some of the most important people in our lives will be with us as we celebrate maddy’s third birthday. again. (yeah, maddy’s birthday sort of runs from her actual birthdate of march 24th to her estimated due date of mid may). she and her friends will be beating a piñata, eating cupcakes, and throwing things around our backyard…
Yellow Roses
The day this posts, April 11th, is my daughter’s 20th birthday. No longer a teenager. Maybe not quite a full adult, but a day to let her know how much I love her, and how I wish for only good things in her future. Rather than buy her some new gadget, I decided to spend a little extra, and let her know what I truly thought of her. She is my diamond.
march 24th.
i made the decisionto carry on atradition that i startedin 2009…to take mymaddy on a tripfar away from everything, to ensure thatthe focus be onher and herbirthday, rather than the day that follows. i’m happy to say, i succeeded. (i’m one lucky dad).
3 years
This morning will mark three years since I’ve held your warm hand. Heard your snores. Felt safe knowing I was yours. My life doesn’t stop today as it did three years ago….although I partially wish it would. There are appointments to be attended, childcare to sort out and errands to run.I’d like to lay in my bed and think of only you. To keen…
The Positive Side of Awful
I hate that I have learned so much, and have become a better person, because of Lisa’s death. And I am not patting myself on the back, I truly hate that I am better and have learned so much because of her death. I want her back more than ever so I can show her how much better I am. We would have a better marriage, because I now understand the…
Roses for Deltha
In what has become a tradition of ours, this Tuesday my kids and I placed roses in the sand. We tend to commemorate milestones related to my wife and especially the anniversary of her death by going to her favorite place, the beach. Inevitably whatever flowers we have wind up being planted ever so gently in the sand. Some years we’ll add a short…
Halloween
Halloween…I think as an adult you move past this particular celebration…until you have kids! Since Grayson was old enough to hold his trick or treat bag, Halloween has been one of the more fun holidays of the year. Grayson’s costumes have become gradually more frightening as the years have passed. We’ve moved from pumpkin (4 months) to Wizard…
2 Years Later
I just returned from England and decided to sift through posts I wrote on my first “once-in-a-lifetime” trip after Michael was killed. This poem sums it all up…My life here without him…my presence on this earth…my impact from that which he embedded in my being. The sentiments and feelings are still the same…as well as the love:9.11.08 Wow!!…
Five Years Ago Today
As a young teen, my husband Daniel traveled on Amtrak to St. Louis Missouri with his parents and five siblings. When he spoke of this trip many years later, his fondest memories were of staying up all night in the sleeper car rocking to the rhythmic movements of the train, watching the Texas landscape flash by, playing Gin Rummy as the train…
happy birthday.
it wasn’t the kind of birthday celebration i would have chosen, for her but then there’s very little about this situation that either one of us would have.but after three of them without her this was by far the best. not because i’m over what happened or because i’ve moved on (i prefer the phrase, “moving through,” implying an active process vs.










