This past week a friend of mine inquired whether I might be free to have dinner with him. I was fairly sure that I was free but reflexively responded that I first needed to check my “busy” calendar. I was not trying to be flippant. In fact, despite my de facto retirement from the practice […]
Widowed and Healing
Steps Toward Healing
Step-by-Step we grow through grief Merriam-Webster defines “step” as STEP n. 1 – an action planned or taken to achieve a desired result 2 – an individual part of a process… STEP-BY-STEP adj. 1 – proceeding or changing by steps or degrees On April 9, 2023 (6 days prior to the […]
When Strangers Become Family
Early last week a widow friend texted our widow group chat that was started after Camp Widow San Diego. She had shared with us that she needed to go to the hospital for her daughter. I was driving as I read this text and immediately my heart dropped for her. It took me right back […]
Rerouting the Neural Map
With this Post, I realize that I’ve officially reached my one year milestone of writing for the Widow’s Voice blog. My first Post of October1, 2022 “Pumping Gas on Ruff Roads” relayed my solo trip to New Jersey with my puppy, Quint and a small urn of Rich’s ashes in tow. I spent time at […]
An Invitation: Be Water
Be water. Flowing, flexible and soft. a still pond invites insect landings; water responds with ripples (My responses to life can be gentle or fierce) Subtly powerful power lurks—ALIVE—just beneath the surface (Am I in tune with the power within me?) still waters contrast with powerful flash floods wreaking destruction […]
Family Photos Minus One
Last week the kids and I went to Fort Walton Beach for a week of fun and sun. This vacation was one I planned with two other families that we are friends with. In total, we had 5 adults and 10 children. Each family rented their own condo at the complex and we managed to […]
Stops Along the Road
On Thursday, September 28th, Rich and I would’ve celebrated our 27th Wedding Anniversary. As I’ve shared in my bi-line and bio below, we celebrated our 25th anniversary up at the Jersey Shore, also spending time cleaning out my family home in Hackensack to prepare for its sale. It was a special time spent with people […]
Self Compassion
Revisited The poetry in italics are quotes from a blog post entitled Self Compassion written by my earlier widowed self. This post is a clarification and love note to my current widowed self. When words don’t come easily I write in poetry. In May of 2023, I was trying to capture Self Compassion because […]
I Miss Him Out Loud
An old friend of ours called me this week. He calls on occasion to check in on the kids and me. Every time he calls, he asks how the house is and if I need help with anything. I have yet to accept his help or call him when something breaks. But it is nice […]
A “Weekness” For Dogs
Sometime around 2009, I came across an observance called National Dog Week. Founded by a man named Captain Wm. Lewis Judy in 1928, this intriguing slice of canine Americana fascinated me; there really was an actual seven day observance just to celebrate dogs and the humans that love them during the last week of September […]
Introverts: Stay in the Work
I get overwhelmed easily with “too many” of anything. Too many choices, too many words at first glance, too many ways to find my way to peace and healing. I have to back away. Take a beat. If I understood myself as an introvert earlier in my life, it is likely I could have avoided […]
Living with Triggers
After going through such a traumatic loss having anxiety and being scared or jumpy all seemed to be part of the package. A year and a half in those feelings are still there. They might not be as intense as they were a couple of months after Erik’s passing, but they continue to just lie […]