So those of you who follow me here or have read my book or have kept up with my grief and life “tsunami”, as I call it, know that my dead husband Don loved music. (you probably also know that I use terms like “grief tsunami” and “dead husband” because I hate the terms “grief […]
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The More Things Change…
My first email of 2022 contained the subject line, “Greetings from Lee.” In her email, Lee apologized for not previously sending along certain linked photographs. Of course, I highly doubted this message was sent to me by Lee, since it’s now going on two years that she died. Additionally, looking at the URL coupled with […]
Building My Wings on the Way Down Reflection
I wrote this post in 2018 and included an addendum at the end for how things feel this year, in 2022. Ringing in the new year without you is something I never want to do. This year, or ever. No matter how much time passes, no matter how my life changes; and no matter where […]
Don’t Make the Best of it. Own It.
This weekend, New Years Eve, to be exact, was me and Nick’s first wedding anniversary. On that night, we were supposed to attend a huge NYE party at a local establishment; complete with live music, prime rib dinners, dancing, and countdown to midnight festivities. We have been to this party before, a couple years back, […]
A Very Covid Christmas
I celebrated Thanksgiving with Robyn and her brood, but assured Lee’s brother, Paul, that I would be celebrating Christmas with him and his family. Neither Robyn nor I celebrate Christmas as a matter of faith, but it’s an important holiday for Paul just as it was an important holiday for Lee. Sharing this holiday with […]
Not Bad, Just Different
Its the day after Christmas, and we are finally getting settled in at home after running around and doing short visits with both families (mine and my husbands.) Nick and I made up some bags of homemade goodies and treats to give out to the neighbors and family and a couple close friends. He made […]
Year in Review
I made my first modest contributions to this site on February 4, 2021. As I look back on this first year’s output, I am surprised to see that I have now filed more than 40 reports concerning my personal journey as a widower, and there is still one week left to go before we finally […]
Season of Hope
Staci was not able to write this week so we are featuring a post originally written in 2020. Hope you enjoy! In my fifth year of widowhood, I am trying to focus on who I am becoming. I will not pretend that I am “okay” without him. I am not. However, I am not entirely […]
REMEMBERING NOT TO FORGET
So yesterday was the anniversary of the day that Don proposed to me under the Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree in NYC. I share this milestone date with a dear widow friend who lives in NYC, and the “crapaversary” of her death date is the same day as my proposal anniversary – December 18th. Yesterday she […]
My Old Man
As a seven-year-old I wrote an essay entitled, “My Old Man,” for a second-grade writing assignment about our fathers, and instantly it had created a furor. Perhaps my teacher thought I was being disrespectful. If so, then she would have been wrong. However, I never received any explanation why she was discomfited. All I knew […]
Proposals, Plural
So one year ago today, my husband Nick asked me to marry him. He did it at our favorite restaurant where we met in person and had our first date. He did it in the front area of the restaurant, by the Christmas tree and fireplace area, down on one knee, with one of their […]
Unavoidable Grief
I was on my way back home from visiting Bob and Linda when I got Paul’s call informing me that Steve had died. Steve is the father of Paul’s daughter-in-law, Katie. Paul reported that Steve had died just three weeks after complaining of stomach pain and getting a diagnosis of Stage 4 pancreatic cancer. I […]