How Grief Impacts Feelings At age 26, I received a helpful definition for feelings. You may be thinking that could be a bit late in life to receive information about something that impacts life on a daily basis and you would be right. Regardless of timing, I gratefully received this definition. “Feelings are spontaneous, inner […]
Newly Widowed
2800 A Day
On July 20th, I walked out of Michele Neff Hernandez’s keynote address at Camp Widow in San Diego to a text message indicating bad news back home. Thankfully, the text indicated my kids were okay. As I rode the escalator to a quieter part of the hotel my mind raced through scenarios of what the […]
The Gift of Camp Widow
in San Diego once again! The first Camp Widow showed up as “The First Annual National Conference on Widowhood.” Take a moment and consider that we’re celebrating the 16th year of Camp Widow this coming weekend. Many more than sixteen camps have endured. Add to that Canada and Australia—Wow! All major accomplishments that started […]
Summertime
and it is HOT in Riverside, California! Awakening to climbing temperatures that announce at 6:00 am another hot day on the way. I rise to turn on the fans. Oddly the first thought is about the heat and not about my widowed status. You see, there are many […]
A Personal Eclipse
On April 4th, I ordered my eclipse glasses in preparation for the 2024 Solar Eclipse. Although I knew that the best places to observe were Texas, Mexico, and Canada, I would be settling for my patio in Riverside, CA. I donned my funky glasses and looked toward the sun which showed up as a fat, […]
Comparing Grief Confessions
[today’s view in contrast to 166+ days out . . .] Hi Babe, It’s been 166 days, 22 hours, 32 minutes and 16 seconds since you left. [it is now 1,126 days since he left . . .] The clock ticks on as I write, rendering the time estimate incorrect seconds after […]
The Many Masks of Grief
. . . my story What am I feeling? Bad. I feel bad. Am I experiencing this feeling from a lack of sleep? Have I eaten? I’m feeling depressed. Is this feeling related to another step in my grief? Another reality check? (I check the calendar…is this an anniversary my body is remembering?) […]
Facing Ambush
Part of the Work of Grief Sometimes your feelings are right. You need to take a chill pill, slow down, hang out with friends, and cry your heart out. Other times, they need to be corrected. What you need to do then is examine your emotions, separate false from truth, make a plan for refreshing, […]
In the Shadow of the Anniversary
Year Three My imagination moves toward the clouds when I think of Dan. In the early days, I explored the clouds with curiosity and searched for him there. This particular cloud image is meant to show me past the event, so I selected one with light, shadow, darkness and clouds. The death-day passed with hard […]
Traveling in the Land of Grief
Buried under too many things to mention, I reached out to Mary and asked her to use this blog from my earliest days of grief as a fill-in for Wednesday, April 10th. As I move toward the 3-Year Anniversary milestone, just days away, it was bittersweet reading this post from the beginning of my journey. I hope […]
Widowed Movies
Fact: I am a hopeless cinephile. I was reminded of my love of film while watching a documentary on YouTube named “Sr.” The film features the life of Robert Downey, Sr., created and filmed by his son. We visit the elder Downey’s life as a filmmaker and follow while he is being filmed in real […]
The Surreal Experience of Time and Loss
“Today, March 26, 2024, the moon is 16 days old and is entering the waning gibbous phase of its lunar cycle. It is 98% illuminated.” — Space.com This morning I stepped out the back door and came face to face with the moon. It was around 5:30 a.m. The moon appeared full-ish tho’ my awareness […]