For the past 16 years I’ve been visited by a melancholy that begins mid-August and lasts through September. Some years it has spoken quite loudly; other years just a quiet whisper. This year feels especially heavy. I’ve mentioned previously that my two wedding anniversaries and two death dates are very closely connected: I married Vern […]
Miscellaneous
Navigating Cones of Uncertainty
It’s been a long week filled with many dedicated hours preparing the canal house for its new occupants. Hard to believe that I closed on this property two years ago this October. I couldn’t say it then, but that house needed extreme TLC. Basically, it was a hot mess, but I didn’t want to hurt […]
I’m making a list …
“When something bad happens you have three choices. You can either let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.” I’ve certainly let Jim’s death define me during these past 10+ months – and I did it after Vern died, too. Lots of hurts and oh so many tears. […]
Navigating Unpaved Roads
The other day, an archived Facebook post, and accompanying photo, caught me by surprise. It was the first photo I’d taken of the log home I’ve since come to call home for the past three years. August 2nd, 2023. It was the day I’d actually toured the home in person after staring at it […]
I (YOU) Will Survive ❤️🩹
“At first I was afraid, I was petrifiedThinking I could live without you by my side” Meet my girlfriends Lizzie, widowed for six years, has three amazing teenage and young adult boys. Evelyn has been divorced for more than ten years and has one amazing teenage daughter and one spunky, super-cool tween son 😎. The […]
I’m Becoming ….
I’ve been posting a lot about aging, I know. That number – 75 – just seemed to consume me and became my identity for all sorts of reasons. Losing Jim. His family. Still missing Vern. Feeling sick. Being alone. But I’m grateful to share that there’s been a much needed change. It’s been subtle, gradual. […]
“Small” Strong Steps Forward
Last Tuesday I attended a County Commissioner’s meeting here in Putnam County, Florida. I showed up to support the important issue of animal code enforcement which is truly needed here in this rural county. Recently, a young woman was rescued during a dog attack and there have been fatalities in this county as well as […]
Happy Birthday, Jim
Jim’s 80th birthday was Thursday. We had talked about doing something extra special in 2026 when I hit 75 and he hit 80 … a trip to Hawaii, perhaps … or maybe even Italy! It was fun thinking about what we might decide to do … until he got so sick and we just took […]
The Tree of Life Grows On
At 5:30am Thursday, I received a text from my brother John (I was already up). He, his wife and son were in the Hartsfield Airport in Atlanta, GA, waiting to board a plane for California. They were travelling to attend the Services for Oliver Tree, who is the son or our cousin Christine and her […]
Ramblings
It’s another one of those weeks where I really have a lot of my mind, but trouble writing about it. One of the things is the passage of time. I’m not sure I really valued time as much as I do now before loved ones in my life started dying, which is a bit of […]
Staring at the blank page before you ….
Spent a lot of time this week reminiscing … reading the old blog I started right after Vern died, looking through photos of special times I had with Jim and with Vern, and beginning to write in a new personal blog for this time in my life after losing Jim. I am so very […]
Moving Forward in the Garden of Chaos
I took a few days off this past week to spend some time with some very good friends in New England. I am posting from the Manchester-Boston Regional Airport on a cool overcast morning. While up here I’ve loved viewing the beautiful older homes surrounded by gardens filled with native flowers and hard wood forests, […]