Happy Anniversary, my love. Just a couple of kids who fell in love and were married just out of high school. Who knew we’d spend 51+ years together on this earth? A spark made it possible. The spark dimmed at times, but it never went completely out. We learned how to re-ignite it. We had […]
decades together
I’ll Be Seeing You
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9l44_n60QQ8 I’ll be seeing you just yesterday you reminded me of your presence when a monarch butterfly came so close to me…flew into the garage and looked around….at the story, when the paint brushes I need showed up in the most unlikely place . . . I am seeing you . . . In all […]
Exploring
The Puzzle of Time Sitting at my desk, on May 17th (a Tuesday) at 8:48 pm Pacific Standard Time. The day flew by with little to count for it. Tomorrow we are mid-week as another week flies by. Time . . . Time is a wily character. It flies when you hope it will crawl. […]
WHO AM I?
WHO AM I NOW? In talking with an old friend yesterday—recently widowed and in that oh-so-new-place of figuring out life without them—I found myself musing about who I am at mile marker 314 days. It’s hard not to compare life “then” with life “now”. The feeling, no longer new but never normal, of something missing; […]
A STRONG PRESENCE
. . . and a Christmas Story The longer I live the more I realize how different we are as humans. What matters to one is barely a blip on the radar screen to another. What one treasures can be opposite of what another would give their life to protect. My entire life, as long […]
NEARING YEAR’S END
Noticing the Passing of Time Frost is something that we take notice of when it arrives to our Southern California neighborhood. Many winters come and go without so much as an icy car windshield at year’s end when many places in our hemisphere are covered in snow. It was a balmy April night when he […]
Today I am thinking about us . . .
. . . and horses . . . I surprised myself the other day at how emotional I got about recalling how much horses taught me about life and living. A friend posted a lovely story about mares….how they have to protect their young and fight off any predators that seek to harm their foals. […]
GRATEFUL
A PHOTO JOURNAL OF GRATITUDE On the day before a long past Thanksgiving, after a days-long vigil, my dearest Auntie Martha passed away in a hospital bed set up in her room with her best friend of sixty-plus years and her niece by her side. “I think she’s gone,” Diane said, reaching over to close […]
i carry your heart with me
i carry it in my heart . . . after e.e. cummings poem i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart) i am never without it (anywhere i go you go, my dear) e.e. cummings i carry your heart with me the heart that broke—grew—broke literally—and mended […]
Confessions
Hi Babe, It’s been 166 days, 22 hours, 32 minutes and 16 seconds since you left. The clock ticks on as I write, rendering the time estimate incorrect seconds after I type it. Confession seems warranted since I sometimes cannot remember if I’ve showered— and apparently I made a tribute tile for you but I […]
Traveling in the Land of Grief
One hundred and fifty two days ago my beloved husband transitioned into death. In that time I have learned that the reality of death and grief is something that cannot be understood unless you are in it. I thought I knew something of it, having experienced other loved ones passing. I was wrong. The photo […]
Love Always Wins
The Power of Memory Do you ever wonder how certain memories come back to teach us about ourselves? The lesson for me in this week’s post is that dying is damn hard. Sometimes, in the midst of it, we don’t feel the full impact. Then your dog dies and it all comes rushing in. Death […]