some of us were talking about madeline’s long fingers. someone suggested that she should be a piano player. i said, “just like her momma”and then i realized… i was in love with liz for over 12 years and i never saw her play the piano. and that made me sad. then i got to thinking about the other stuff we never did. we never skied…
Widowed Parenting
I Can’t Make Up My Mind …. Part 2
Last week I wrote about my sons and the likeness each one has of Jim. I mentioned that I have let the boys go through Jim’s clothes. Well, I’ve decided that I can’t make up my mind about that, either. I want Jim’s clothes to do more than just sit in a closet. I think. I want the boys to be able to have something of their dad’s and to be able to…
Always Look on the Bright Side of Life…
So here I sit, 7 days til the anniversary. I am absolutely beyond swamped at work (could I have more meetings and more documents to review??) and overwhelmed with personal commitments as well – a funeral (no, they never stop, and they are always sad), two evening meetings, basketball, Halloween parties, homework, and that is just to get me to…
My Other Car is a Porsche
You know those bumper stickers that say things like, “My Other Car is a Porsche?” The implication is that the driver isn’t quite satisfied with their real car and that they have a much nicer one parked at home. I can appreciate this sentiment.My “other car” is my other life—the one I was supposed to be living right now complete with a…
what happened…
i’ve been hearing that question a lot. so… for those of you who don’t know here goes…5 weeks of bedrest. (2 at home, 3 in the hospital). liz had low amniotic fluid. baby had her cord around her neck. baby’s heart rate dropped (multiple times). liz almost delivered (multiple times). the day finally came (3/24). madeline was born via…
I Can’t Make Up My Mind …. Part 1
…. I really can’t. Not about everything, but by a couple of kind of big things, one of which I have no control over whatsoever: my sons and their similarities with their Dad.Son #1 is so much like Jim that it amuses, stuns and stops me cold sometimes. I find more humor in it than sadness, but there’s still the sadness. He has the same dry sense…
march 24, 2008
Our new Thursday blog author is Matt Logelin. His emotional candor and willingness to share his life, and his grief, with millions of people across the globe have made him a media sensation. With appearances on Oprah, The Rachel Ray Show, People Magazine, and over 50,000 blog followers, Matt’s widowhood story has mobilized the compassion and…
renovated reactions
On the day our daughter, Liv, first started preschool, my husband, Jeff, and I dropped her off together. We helped her off with her coat. We put her shoes on the mat. Then, we stared expectantly at her wondering (possibly hoping) if she would start to cry and demand that we stay. She didn’t. In fact, Liv told us with thirteen year old form, “You…
8 Strangers
Peace comes tonight in the form of 8 strangers. Mexican and Jewish, white and other, one young with child on the way, one older with a young child, spiritual, long haired, outgoing and quiet, well dressed and unclipped toe nails.We are strangers. We come together and shut the door, shut the unclear, confusing and sometimes mean world on the other…
joining the team
Hi, I’m Jackie. Unfortunately, if you’re reading this, you are most likely on the same dreaded team as me – a Widow. On March 25th, 2008, my husband, Jeff, our kids and I woke early to get him to the doctor because he hadn’t been feeling well. He had put off going to the GP because he hated to admit there was ever anything physically wrong…
No fixing.
School is in session! I have looked forward to this day for over two months. Not because I want Anneke gone, because I don’t, but because with the house empty of daughter and S.O. I get to write without distraction.This past weekend, Labor Day Weekend, I really labored. I cleaned the house, washed the floors, weeded the garden, did three loads of…
What Not To Say
OK …. forgive me, but I’m cheating today. I’m copying a post I put on my blog over a year ago … just a couple of months after Jim died. I’ve had several requests to post it again, which I did on my blog earlier this year, and I thought I’d post it here, too. It was a list of the top things that my children and I did NOT need to hear, but did,…