Maggie and I loved to travel and we made a great travel team. One of our favorite activities was hangin’ with the locals in local restaurants and pubs. I was the shy one. She, however, met no one but friends. One evening, somewhere in Greece, Spain, Italy, Mexico, New Orleans or somewhere else, we were chatting it up with one of the locals.
Widowed by Illness
Tired, Exhausted
This has been quite a week. It was one of those weeks that took so much inner strength, and perseverance, to get through. For one, my now 13 year old has recently fallen so behind in his school work, and his grades were literally tanking. He has some issues, one of which being significant ADHD, which requires a real team effort on the part of his…
I Have The Ring
I have The Ring. The one that binds all rings together. I’ve been looking at it lately Playing with it. Putting it on my left hand, where there has been no ring for over a year And it feels…not right anymore. It feels wrong on my left finger because it doesn’t feel like… me.The Ring. The one that binds all rings together. I had Art’s…
Last Person Standing
A week ago I showed up for a meeting in a different state, that was planned over a month before, to find that the person who was in charge of the agenda was missing. The reason for her absence was that she just found out her best friend has cancer, and her dear friend’s diagnosis was delivered to her around the first anniversary of the death of her…
I’m in between
I’m currently in between jobs. Because I wasn’t exactly sure when my new job would begin, I had to play it cautiously, and give two weeks’ notice to my most recent employer. It was a matter of jumping through many pre-employment hoops, then playing the waiting game of all the required documentation to be returned to the Human Resources office,…
A Different Grief
It was a lovely evening. I could feel the exhaustion running all the way into my finger tips and for once I welcomed it. It was 9:30 pm. I checked the clock 7 times to make sure I hadn’t misread it. 9:30 pm and for once all three of my children were in bed and….asleep. A self-congratulatory smirk (accompanied with a sigh of unimaginable relief)…
Introducing Chris and Maggie
Like everyone else who shares the title “widower” or “widow”, I didn’t ask for this. I didn’t kick sleeping dogs or twist baby toes to make them cry. I can’t imagine what I did that pissed off the devil (or God) to get me to this place but here I am. Here you are. I’m not going anywhere so I might as well be polite and introduce us…
Living With The Past, But Not Living In It.
I received a call last weekend that took me a week, and much anxiety, to return. Back when I first met Michael, I was quickly introduced to his best friend. He’s a wonderful guy, the perfect and loyal friend to Michael, and he was also his first boyfriend. They basically grew up together as adults. They saw each other go through many triumphs and…
The Bikini
“Mom look!” She’s not timid. She’s not afraid. She walks into my office in her first bikini. Until this moment she had never worn one, never as a baby, toddler or little girl. Until this moment she only wore board shorts and rash guards. She has never worn one as the daughter of Art.Two weeks after her 11th birthday she asked for one. I waited for…
Not Okay
I remember using the words “not okay” with Grayson when he was little to teach him that something was wrong. I’m not sure why we used “not okay” instead of “bad” or “wrong” – but I’m sure it was in tune with the current kinder gentler way of teaching kids right from wrong. For whatever reason the phrase has stuck with me, and I’ve used it since…
When good things happen to sad people.
Okay, so here is my dilemma. What am I supposed to do when life is going well. Or, well enough? I have been publicly writing, blogging, for three and a half years now. At first it was to keep family and friends up to date with Michael’s battle with his brain cancer. Back then I wrote about medical updates, explaining the next chemotherapy trial,…
Home Destruction
On my way to my morning breakfast taco place, I had to dodge a large truck in the road carrying a huge backhoe. Oh brother, I thought. They are going to tear something up. That’s going to be an inconvenience for someone. And I didn’t pay another thought to it, at least until I drove by on my way back home just thirty minutes later. The beast…