So in preparing for my husbands upcoming triple bypass surgery, which will happen on July 20th, a few things have had to be changed or altered in order for us to make sure he is following doctors orders of getting rest, not lifting things, and not doing anything too stressful or strenuous. Nick had purchased […]
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Three Old Men
My close friendships with Eric and Bob go back to our high school days. We have remained so throughout these many years, despite the changes in our respective personal circumstances that inevitably occur over the course of a lifetime: wives and girlfriends, children and grandchildren, jobs and careers, and health being chief among these. The […]
o grief
you trip me up o grief you sneak up on me you fool me you trip me up o grief you catch me unawares you pretend a thing is okay you trick me o grief you seem to be at a distance you move in close you sabotage me o grief gimme […]
A Second Chance
So there has been something going on that is a very big deal that I have wanted to talk about for quite awhile in here, but until now, I didnt have my husband Nick’s permission to do so. Why his permission? Because the “something” is about him and his health. Unlike me, when something significant […]
Message in a Bottle
As you knew would happen, it’s been an emotional couple of weeks for me as I approach the second anniversary of the date of your passing. I have no clue where to find you or, really, any way to know whether you exist apart. I do know that when I look up into the night […]
Its not Fair!
There are times in this widowed life where I just want to scream at the universe or God or whatever randomness helps things to happen to people … ITS NOT FAIR!!! Its not fair that a widowed acquaintance of mine who lost his wife to cancer just 3 years ago, is finally starting to get […]
The Good Ones
So its Fathers Day today. Always an emotional and complicated day. Over the years, this day has been one that I have carried with many mixed emotions. The sudden death of my husband Don, of course, comes to mind first. He was only 46 yrs old when he died, he always wanted to be a […]
Arrow of Time
I was married to Lee on June 12th, which was this past Sunday. Can I still say that June 12th is my anniversary? Or that June 12th was my anniversary? Should I say that June 12th would have been our anniversary? Using proper grammar can be daunting, especially when referring to a loved one who […]
Grief Expert
Lately, I have been asked to appear on several podcasts, or take part as a speaker or be interviewed for “Grief Summits” and “Grief Conferences” and other such events which have intimidating and very serious sounding titles. The reason I’ve been asked to do these events quite often recently, is because the TEDx talk that […]
A Piece of Me
From time to time in these musings I have mentioned that I am a charter member of the Frazier Thomas Band. The Frazier Thomas Band was the imaginary air guitar band my oldest and nearest friends and I formed back in the late sixties to celebrate our halcyon days of youth. It seemed to grow […]
Find Your Sanctuary
Life is hard. Widowed life is hard. Sometimes things happen in life that really have nothing to do with my widowhood, but they are just “life” things that happen and that are stressful, and because I am widowed, my perspective on these things and how I handle them and cope with them is different – […]
Life Digresses
Suddenly, to my mild surprise, things are popping on my end that involve potentially life-altering changes. Suddenly there are unavoidable matters at hand that I must attend to without distraction or delay. Unfortunately, as a result, this means that for one week I must defer sharing my widower observations and feelings with you. My apologies […]