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Emma Pearson

Poster Child – but not for the reasons I would have wanted

Posted on: April 18, 2023 | Posted by: Emma Pearson

Photo by P – family friend – photo of our two girls, which P keeps stuck behind a piece of art from Julia It was Julia’s 19th birthday a couple of weeks ago. On 30th March. Still her birthday. Even if she is not alive to enjoy it, to celebrate it, to live it, to […]

Categories: Child Loss, Widowed, Widowed Memories, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Anniversaries, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions, Widowed by Illness, Multiple Losses

8th April

Posted on: April 11, 2023 | Posted by: Emma Pearson

Photos my own, taken today   It generates a sicky feeling in my tummy. A sinking of my heart. A shortening of my breath. An increase in my heart’s rate. A tensing of my belly. A weakening of my arms’ and legs’ strength. Trembly fingers.   This date. 8th of April. Typing it out. Seeing […]

Categories: Child Loss, Widowed, Widowed Memories, Widowed and New Love, Widowed Anniversaries, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions, Widowed by Illness, Multiple Losses

The Body Remembers – Again

Posted on: April 4, 2023 | Posted by: Emma Pearson

This morning I awoke at exactly 4h00. It’s not entirely uncommon that I am awake around that time.   But to awaken at exactly 4h00. On 30th March. The body remembers.   Nineteen years ago, at that very moment, I woke up. I needed the loo. As in to poo. And I knew. Because late […]

Categories: Child Loss, Widowed, Widowed Memories, Widowed Anniversaries, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions, Widowed by Illness, Multiple Losses

NNTR and other attempts to influence language

Posted on: March 28, 2023 | Posted by: Emma Pearson

Image by i-am_nah on Unsplash Back in the 1980s, and possibly into the 1990s, I was quite an avid reader of two “wimmin’s magazines” – Company and Cosmopolitan. I just looked up to see if they still exist – they do. But I am curious how I ever found any of it interesting. Perhaps it […]

Categories: Child Loss, Widowed, Widowed Effect on Family/Friends, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Emotions, Widowed by Illness, Multiple Losses

“Pas Voulu Mais Choisi”

Posted on: March 21, 2023 | Posted by: Emma Pearson

Image by Josue Michel on Unsplash 18 March 2023 I have just come back from my Saturday morning swim with the Masters. When I say, “with the Masters”, I speak rather relatively. Yes, I am part of the Masters group, and so get access to special opening times, long before the sun rises. On Saturdays […]

Categories: Child Loss, Widowed, Widowed Effect on Family/Friends, Widowed and New Love, Widowed Emotions, Widowed by Illness, Multiple Losses

A Monstruous Web of Grief and Loss

Posted on: March 14, 2023 | Posted by: Emma Pearson

Main image by Guille Pozzi on Unsplash I saw yet another film today. I am seeing rather a few at the moment. Anytime I go into town, I work out whether or not I can sneak in a film on my way home. And sometimes I can. So I just do. Late afternoon or early […]

Categories: Child Loss, Widowed, Widowed Effect on Family/Friends, Widowed Emotions, Widowed by Illness, Multiple Losses

Love Is Not Always Enough

Posted on: March 7, 2023 | Posted by: Emma Pearson

Image by freestocks on Unsplash Last night I saw “The Son”, which I knew would be a hard film. (** Spoiler Alerts ** Don’t read if you want to see the film **) I knew from the trailer that it was about teenage struggle – possibly linked to mental health issues related to loss, gender- […]

Categories: Child Loss, Widowed, Widowed Parenting, Widowed Memories, Widowed and New Love, Widowed by Illness, Multiple Losses

Conversations Without Spaces Erase Entire Lives

Posted on: February 28, 2023 | Posted by: Emma Pearson

Main image by Red Zeppelin on Unsplash I was invited for dinner at a friend’s house last night. Medjool was also invited and joined. We so rarely get invited out as a couple. His friends invite him out, and invariably he goes without me. My friends invite me out, but without inviting him. Actually, no […]

Categories: Child Loss, Widowed, Widowed Effect on Family/Friends, Widowed and New Love, Widowed Emotions, Widowed by Illness, Multiple Losses

Let’s Talk About Death Over Dinner

Posted on: February 21, 2023 | Posted by: Emma Pearson

Image by Nadia Valko on Unsplash A couple of weeks ago I hosted a dinner where the sole focus was to talk about all things Death and Dying. (And Grief, because, heck, it’s inseparable). I had come across the concept of this kind of dinner during the months after Mike died, and decided, “Okay – […]

Categories: Child Loss, Widowed, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Emotions, Widowed by Illness, Multiple Losses

It’s Not About the Roses

Posted on: February 14, 2023 | Posted by: Emma Pearson

Image by Yoksel on Unsplash It’s Valentine’s Day already in some parts of the world. I know that the date fills a number of my fellow widbuds with Horror. Or Grief. Or Sadness. Or Resentment. There’s such “noise” around Valentine’s day in (at least Anglophone) parts of the world – it’s one of those many […]

Categories: Child Loss, Widowed, Widowed Memories, Widowed and New Love, Widowed Holidays, Widowed by Illness, Multiple Losses

Choosing Life – A Love Letter to Julia from Paula

Posted on: February 7, 2023 | Posted by: Emma Pearson

Photo of Paula & Julia by a school friend I wake up to a firm ray of sunlight bursting through my dormitory window on July 2nd, 2019. I can’t wait to finally see my family after what feels like years. Suddenly, an inexplicable feeling of heaviness fills my chest, making it hard to get out […]

Categories: Child Loss, Widowed, Widowed Effect on Family/Friends, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Emotions, Widowed by Illness, Multiple Losses, Uncategorized

What does hope look like for me now?

Posted on: January 31, 2023 | Posted by: Emma Pearson

Image by precious widbud Charlotte MacNaughton – Yellowknife, Canada’s Northwest Territories (Jan 2023) Way back when, back in my life before, and soon after I had started up my business, Kaleidoscope Development, I wrote a blogpost on “Hope”. It was 21st April 2014. I actually called it, “Hope – Part One”, and a week later, […]

Categories: Child Loss, Widowed, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Emotions, Widowed by Illness, Multiple Losses

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