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sudden death

Disappearing

October 23, 2015 by Kelley Lynn Leave a Comment

I’m in a state of panic. This happens now and again – one of the frightening realities of sudden and shocking death. Sometimes a few weeks or months will go by with me able to escape the panic and anxiety. Then, just like that, something happens – or doesn’t – and I am shaking back and forth and my skin is on fire and I’m pacing the floors of my…

Filed Under: Widowed Signs from Loved One, Widowed Suddenly Tagged With: forgetting him, Signs, Don Shepherd, sudden death, widowed young, disappearing, kelley lynn

Not Growing Old Together

September 25, 2015 by Kelley Lynn Leave a Comment

Something I say to my grief-therapist often lately, is that I feel like I’m generally doing “okay”, as long as I don’t think about the future, or let my mind wander there. I feel okay or sometimes even good, as long as I can stay in the present. Do you know what she said back to me? She said: “So stay in the present.” Oh, okay then. Guess I’m done…

Filed Under: Widowed Birthdays, Widowed Anniversaries, Widowed Suddenly Tagged With: anniversaries, Don Shepherd, sudden death, widowed young, growing old together, growing old alone, decades together, teammates in life, birthdays, kelley lynn

What A Man Is

August 28, 2015 by Kelley Lynn Leave a Comment

I am a strong and fiercely independent woman. I always have been. When I was 18 years old, in 1990, I left my comfy small town of Groton, Massachusetts, to attend college and live in NYC. I wanted to be a performer, actor, comedian, writer, or anything that got me out of that boring and predictable suburban life. I wanted more. So I went out on my…

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Signs from Loved One, Widowed Therapy, Widowed Suddenly Tagged With: young widow, feeling safe, widowed, therapy, kelley lynn, grief, Signs, sudden death, testosterone, man, scared of life, nightmares

New Life, Old Life

July 3, 2015 by Kelley Lynn Leave a Comment

If I’m being 100% honest, which I always am in my writing about loss, there are actually two of me. Version One of me was born on September 26, 1971, and she died on July 13, 2011. Version Two of me was born on the same day, within seconds even, of version one’s tragic death. Version One never saw it coming. A massive heart-attack took her husband…

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Anniversaries, Widowed Holidays, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Signs from Loved One, Widowed Therapy, Widowed Suddenly Tagged With: grief, movies, 4th of july, death anniversary, Signs, making plans, sudden death, young widow, grief triggers, widowed, picnics, therapy, kelley lynn

Anchor

June 26, 2015 by Kelley Lynn Leave a Comment

I went to the doctor today. I know. That doesn’t sound like a big deal, but believe me, in my world, it is. When my husband died suddenly just under 4 years ago, we were living paycheck to paycheck. We shared his beat up old car to get to our jobs, and we had nothing in savings. We lived in a crappy and small apartment in New Jersey, and we were…

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Signs from Loved One, Widowed Therapy, Widowed Suddenly, Miscellaneous Tagged With: health, panic, scared, Signs, sudden death, young widow, doctor, anxiety, anchor, widowed, therapy, kelley lynn, grief

Everywhere

June 19, 2015 by Kelley Lynn Leave a Comment

There was a time, early on in my loss, where I felt like I was constantly on the search for my husband. Every second of every day was spent , in my mind and heart, trying to locate him somehow. People kept telling me over and over and over that he is always with me, that he is in my heart, and all those other cliche’, blah-blah-blah things that…

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Signs from Loved One, Widowed Therapy, Widowed Suddenly Tagged With: young widow, widowed, therapy, kelley lynn, grief, Signs, sudden death

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