…. way too quickly sometimes. Or is it just mine? I doubt that ….. look who I’m writing to. We ALL know that life went rushing by too fast. But my life as been so hectic in the last day or so, that not only did I not write on my own blog yesterday, I forgot to write my post for this blog!!! So, here it is.Another wave this week …. but one I’m…
janine eggers
Peace
It’s surprising to me how much peace one can feel in the middle of a couple of hundred people. Yet that’s exactly what I felt at “Camp Widow” (love the nickname, M!). To be surrounded by so many women, and a great guy, who understand what I’m feeling before I have the words to describe it …… is very peaceful.It’s not that it was all sugar and…
New Adventures
This is a picture from my vacation last week. I’d love to tell you all that it was the most fantastic trip I’ve ever been on. That, however, would be a lie. It was mostly …. not fun. It was mostly ….. lonely. It was mostly …. painful. I really, really needed Jim there. But there is no answer for that need ….. and so I move…
Filterless
Tomorrow is the last full day of my vacation with Son #2 and #3. I knew this vacation would be “different” …. since it was our first one without Jim. But I really had no clue as to how very different it would be.It has been difficult, to say the least. I expected waves ….. but I didn’t expect quite so many. I expected tough times, but I…
Perspective ….
….. is in the eye of the beholder, is it not? This picture was from our last vacation. The last day of our last vacation to be exact. In June of 2007. Six months before Jim died. It was a “different” vacation for us. A different perspective. Only half of our children were able to go. The three girls were working that summer and could…
Masks ….
…. are very heavy to wear for a long period of time and they tend to make my face sweat. I really thought that I was done wearing them after Jim died. I couldn’t wear them. I didn’t have the energy to snap them into place and keep them from sliding off. So I didn’t.But now, now that it’s a year and a half later; I am finding out that some…
Sometimes It’s So Painful … I Just Have to Laugh
Do you ever have one of those days when you think that nothing, NOTHING could top the last stupid thing that happened to you? Today was one of those days. I had three very stupid, and potentially painful, items in my mailbox. All three were from our government. I will refrain from saying any more on that.The first piece was from Social Security.
I Can’t Think About Him ….
….for very long. I find that it’s emotionally and physically impossible for me to sit and just think about Jim. I cannot reflect on memories. Not yet. I can only think of him in snatches of time. And only for a moment. I wonder if this is how most people deal with grief?If I sit and think about him for more than a moment then I feel myself…
Just thinking ….
Hi everyone! It’s good to be back and I’m thankful to Colleen for taking over for me while I was gone. Interestingly enough, she and I share the same anniversary. It was my second without Jim and I’m not gonna lie…. it was tough. But I’m still here. And that’s something.Anyway….. I was just writing to a friend and we were both talking about…
A Lighter Shade of Grey ….
Today’s post is really for all of the “newer” women who are on this path …… the one we didn’t want to be on, the club we didn’t want to join. I was trying to think of what to say to a new friend whose husband died a few months ago. She is in the middle of what I call the “black”. I am not a veteran in this process, by any stretch of the…
Sometimes I talk to him ….
Yes ….. sometimes I talk to Jim. This is a new experience for me. I’ve been a widow for over 16 months and I’ve never really “talked” to him …. until recently. I couldn’t do it before. I couldn’t believe that he could see and hear me. After all, I have no doubt that he is in Heaven …. no doubt at all. And I have no doubt that there…
Regrets?
I’ve been thinking about regrets a lot lately. Not about Jim and me. No way. He knew that he was seriously loved and adored …… as did I. I have no regrets about us and our marriage, other than it wasn’t long enough ….. not by a long shot. This past weekend was our youngest child’s (Son #3) Confirmation. This was our first…