If you read last week’s post, you’ll know that I’ve been having to spend some time at the hospital where Mario spent his last few days. Shortly after posting that, I had gone to visit and the nurses in the ICU told me they were moving my mom to a room in the PCU (progressive […]
Back where it all ended.
I’ve lost track of how many times I’ve had to return to the place where Mario left his earthly body behind. It’s the local hospital. Why I’ve had to go back, repeatedly, is primarily due to the fact there are a lot of older people in my life. Every time I have to go there, […]
Days Gone By and Memories Passed
Days gone by and memories passed, we can’t hold on, they’re not meant to last. Every now and then, something will trigger an old memory for me. They’re almost always of the good times. Thinking back, I really spent the majority of my youth living in the moment. In hindsight, current me is rather impressed […]
Free will, again.
I swear that in this life, my lesson is to learn all about human free will. You’ve probably heard the term (I’ve also mentioned it in a previous post). It’s been around since the ancient Greek philosophers first talked about the notion that humans could freely decide between doing/choosing or not doing/choosing something. Philosophers ever […]
Unexpected Downtime
This week has been a kind of awful that I have not experienced for probably 20 years or more. Tuesday night, I started to feel progressively ill. Like the kind of ill where you know it was something you ate (in my unfortunate case it was a deli salad). By 11pm I was absolutely wrecked […]
Solo Traveling
I’m currently on a 4 day outing on the Oregon coast and typing this post up from my little teardrop trailer. On the drive out here on Wednesday, it occurred to me that I’m not really “camping” in the old sense of the word. No, I’m basically just traveling and living in my little home […]
New Traditions
(Originally posted this in 2024 for Mario’s birthday. I didn’t get to really celebrate this year because I had too many client meetings that day, but am hoping to pick the tradition back up next year.) Just about anyone who’s lost someone will tell you that birthdays of that lost person are tough. Birthdays just […]
More Moments In Time
You ever look through photos of your dearly departed and think to yourself, these are it. There will not be any more or any new photos. This is all there is. It can’t just be me, right? But it’s TRUE. I have a finite number of photos of Mario. There’s one actual photo album I […]
Other Widowed Perspectives
One thing I’ve found just from reading everyone else’s posts here as well as bumping into other widows in person, is that there are things we can all relate to, but each of us is on our own unique journey. A couple weekends ago I decided to check out a small art show that was […]
A long ago sunrise…
I happened to be looking for some old files of work that Mario had done for a client years ago. So I hooked up the old external drive that used to be attached to his computer. I’m sure it’s a little different for everyone, but going through your departed spouses computer files can definitely be […]
Things Left Behind
People leave behind an energy. People leave behind ideas. People leave behind accomplishments. People leave behind material things. And people leave behind emotions in others. In the case where someone is highly creative, they also leave behind works of their creativity. In all these ways, death is not final. Throughout history, humans have expressed themselves […]
The Wine Glass
Yesterday I had a rather miserable day. It was one of those days that if ONE thing would have been different, it actually would have been really great. I had planned to take a day off and go up to the mountains for an afternoon of snowboarding after seeing there might be some sun in […]