Can’t believe it’s already August as another year seems to be flying by here. August is the county fair month here and it always reminds me how much Mario loved sketchy carnival rides. He kind of had the same approach to those as regular amusement park rides, flying on airplanes, or anything else where the […]
Rest
It’s been a tough few weeks and I’ve had a lot to do. I feel like I’ve been in constant motion. And I’ve still not readjusted my schedule after the few nights staying up all night at the hospital while my dad was there. And I’ve still not gotten much more than 5-6 hours of […]
A Mountain of Things
This week I’ve spent a lot of time helping my mom with various things while also watching her ride the rollercoaster of the stages of grief. I know she’s frustrated. She’s 83 and has only so much energy and patience in a day. She really wants to get all of the important things done that […]
One of Us
At 4:17am on July 9th, my mom became one of us. My dad succumbed to the traumatic brain injury sustained in the wreck on June 30th. They were married for 65 years. They got on each others nerves at points, but stuck it out together till death did they part. It’s a good thing I’m […]
A Tough Week
Trigger warnings: car accident, physical trauma, death, hospital scenes. Sunday afternoon a Sheriff knocked on my door. My 86 year old dad crashed his truck. He veered off the road at high speed and slammed into a culvert. He was taken to the local hospital by ambulance, but from the get go, it was clear […]
Extra
I remember during our rave DJ days, Mario and I got booked to play at The Alexandria Hotel in downtown Los Angeles. I had never been there before and I wasn’t aware of the place’s reputation, but I could tell just standing outside, it had a creepy vibe. Our set was at midnight and it […]
A New Adventure
Over the years when Mario and I would go camping, we’d make little upgrades, mostly for our own comfort. We liked to get into the wild outdoors, but were never the type to seriously rough it. In the later years, and after an unexpected rainstorm we survived in a small tent, we always talked about […]
Back to Nature
There has always been a big nature element in my life. Where I grew was not too far from San Diego, but in the 70,s it might as well have been the Outback because the average San Diegan considered it very rural. My parents hailed from Western PA, outside of Pittsburgh in small towns. My […]
Only Happy When It Rains
Mario wasn’t one of those guys who carried on and complained or wilted like a flower when he was sick or had some physical pain. His tolerance was high, bolstered by a masochistic tendency. In a way, he reminded me of that old song by the band Garbage, “Only Happy When It Rains” (in fact, […]
Flow Like Water
Sometimes I do plan a topic that I want to write about in this weekly post and sometimes I just let my brain talk through my hands across the keyboard. This is one of the later types of posts. Everybody dies. There, I said it. It’s that proverbial elephant in the room of life. While […]
Being an Introvert
I missed yet another virtual Widow’s Voice meetup tonight (I’ve been to ONE), not because I don’t want to hang out with those folks, but because I’ve done too much “people-ing” today. Introverts are seriously misunderstood. So many people think that we are just socially awkward or shy and that is what original caused the […]
Making the Best of It
I’m not sure when my mindset changed about making the best of a situation I perceive as undesirable (or actually bad), but I’m pretty sure it was post Mario, but I’m not sure exactly why. Maybe it’s one of those, “don’t sweat the small stuff” type of things kicking in since I’ve already been through […]